The season begins!!!! All the couples run into what looks like a graffiti-covered drainage ditch in LA:
Brian & Ericka are a bi-racial couple. Ericka was Miss America. They “want to show what love is all about no matter the skin tone.” Lance & Keri are introduced next, and Lance is a trial attorney - and when Keri said something, Lance interrupted and didn’t let Keri talk. (Those damn attorneys!) Maria & Tiffany are pro poker players and think they’ll do okay because “we play games for a living.” Zev & Justin are buddies, and Zev has Asperger’s Syndrome. Mika & Canaan are a Christian couple and figure they can pray about winning. Big Easy & Flight Time - Herbert & Nathanial - are Harlem Globetrotters and Flight says they’re the “best looking team ever.” (They are pretty cute!) Sam & Dan say they’re Christian kids but can be bad if they have to. They’re gay and they “came out” to each other. Gary & Matt are father and son, and Matt says they didn’t do anything together while Gary says he’s trying to make up for lost time. (Good luck with that, fellas!) Eric & Lisa are yoga instructors, saying it’s more like “Yoga in the hood - and we’re gonna be numero frickin uno.” (Ok, I’m impressed.) Garrett & Jessica have been dating on & off for years. Garrett says he had no sisters and Jessica is from a family of strong Columbian women. This one should be interesting! Marcy & Ron are our older couple. They met online and Marcy says “I’ve never dated a bald guy before.” Meghan & Cheyne met in grade school, and she’s sure to note she beat him at tether ball.
Phil begins his speech telling the teams their first clue is on their baggage. But! There’s a new twist that they are not going to like. “For one team this will be a very short race.” A wall of license plates hung on a fence are uncovered, and the team that can’t complete the challenge will be eliminated right here and not make it past the start line. Their instructions will be in their clue. “The world is waiting for you. Good luck. Travel safe....Go!”
The teams rush off and read their clues to find out they must search the wall of license plates and find one of eleven plates from Tokyo. The symbol printed on top of the clue must match the plate - but no one notices the symbol on the clue. Big Easy asks “anything else on the clue?” and Flight Time answers “No, I didn’t see nothing.” (Open your eyes, buddy! Get used to it now! READ THE CLUE!!!!) No teams get it right on the first try, and then Justin sees the symbol on the clue. Maria & Tiffany manage to find the plate first, and Marcy & Ron find it next. Meghan & Cheyne manage to get the right plate, followed by Flight Time & Big Easy. Gary & Matt, then Zev & Justin get their plates, and Justin remarks that “we avoided total embarrassment.” Sam & Dan follow with Mika & Canaan right behind, then Garrett & Jessica and Brian & Ericka. Lance finally asks if there’s anything in the clue and sees the symbol. Lucky for them, they find the last license plate before Eric & Lisa, who are left with no license plate and no more tickets. They remark “We took the shame of being eliminated first for everybody else.”
Maria & Tiffany tell everyone they work with homeless kids in LA. “If they know we make a lot of money playing poker they won’t want to help us.” Great idea, but it could blow up in their faces if somehow anyone finds out!
Once in Tokyo, the teams have to find a TV studio at the base of a tower. Maria & Tiffany miss the shuttle off the plane and they start getting snitty with each other already! If they last in this Race, they’re going to be sniping at each other constantly - maybe better than a guy/girl couple! Maria seems to be realistic doom and gloom, while (per Maria) Tiffany tends to “sugar coat everything.” The second flight came in a half-hour early and the teams on the second flight caught up to the other teams. Mika & Canaan’s cab driver turns out to be a suicidal maniac, driving on the shoulder of the road through traffic on the freeway. Nice to get places faster, but not great if you don’t have a death wish!
All the teams get to the tower one by one to find out they will participate in a Japanese game show - Sushi Roulette. It’s a Road Block and one person from each team. “In it, the game show host would spin a wheel containing nine sushi rolls and two wasabi bombs. Wasabi, a spice carrying extreme heat, is Japan’s version of scorching horseradish. The contestants had to eat whatever landed in front of them on the wheel, and they needed to keep playing until they received a wasabi bomb. When they did, they had only two minutes to consume this fireball of flavor to receive their next clue.”
The first two lucky contestants to get the wasabi were Ron and Cheyne. Ron stuffed the wasabi down into the rice, spreading it around so it wasn’t all in one bite, but still had trouble getting it down - he’s looking like he’s gonna hurl! Both end up finishing in time and get their clues. In it, “they find out that they have to use a colored flag to lead a group of 20 Japanese tourists from the studio audience, who were wearing matching colored hats, through the infamously overcrowded Shibuya Scramble Crossing to the Pit Stop at the Konno Hachimangu Shrine.”
Justin and Garrett “luckily” get the wasabi next. Both guys finish in time and off they go with their audience members into the busy streets. Marcy has a megaphone and she’s chanting with her group and being quite weird. She says “Some people think I’m frenetic but I’m in my body having a good time.” (No, Marcy, I just think you’re weird!) Maria gets the wasabi bomb next, by herself. She tries, but doesn’t finish in two minutes. The emcee spins again and Maria gets it again by herself. She looks at her teammate and says “I can’t do another one, Tiffany.” (At this point I’m feeling pretty sorry for her stomach. I can only imagine how she’s gonna feel at the Pit Stop!) She manages to get the second bomb down with maybe a second to spare.
In the streets of Tokyo, Meghan & Cheyne find someone willing to lead them. Marcy & Ron, still wandering the streets with their group, find a map but still can’t find the Shrine. Justin & Zev ask a guy on the street who looks American and speaks great English - and says he will take them.
The lady standing with Phil at the Mat doesn’t look very Japanese to me! She welcomes Meghan & Cheyne as they get to the Mat first with their group. Phil remarks that they’re a little sweaty and Cheyne replies “that’s the only way to be.” (Only if you don’t get eliminated!)
Big Easy and Lance have a turn at the wasabi next. Big Easy finishes quickly with Lance right behind.
Zev & Justin bring their group to Phil at the Mat as team #2. They interview with Justin telling Zev “I’m proud of you man.” Zev tells Justin “I’m proud of you too.” Justin then asks Zev “Should we make out?” and Zev rolls his eyes.
Flight Time laughs that the Tokyo natives“must have thought Godzilla was walking down the street.” Maria & Tiffany stop at a hotel and get a map. Gary gets his wasabi and finishes it, but Brian is gagging and does not finish the wasabi and Ericka looks pissed! She remarks “I should have done this one.” There are three teams out on the streets milling around, but Lance & Keri’s team turns at a corner and gets to the Mat in third place. Dan finally gets the wasabi by himself and downs it (he says he loves sushi). Brian & Ericka were left in an empty studio with just their group, and is lucky to get the wasabi bomb on the next spin. He gets it down with no time to spare. As they’re leaving, Ericka tells him “You can throw up later.”
Marcy & Ron get fourth place and Big Easy & Flight Time take fifth. Brian & Ericka get an “angel” to walk with them to the Shrine and end up in sixth place, making a marvelous comeback. Ericka says “that just proves you have to fight till the end.” One of Garrett & Jessica’s group has to go to the bathroom, slowing them down. Gary & Matt get seventh place and Garrett & Jessica are in eighth. Maria & Tiffany are doing well on their way to the Shrine, but realize they’ve lost two people from their group and have to go back to find them.
Maria is snarking at Tiffany (again). Mika & Canaan find an American guy to tell them where the Shrine is (it seemed most everyone got a good English-speaking native, or an American to help them. Hope they don’t get too used to that!) Sam & Dan split off from Maria & Tiffany to follow Garrett & Jessica and end up in 9th place. They say “That’s horrible but we’ll take it!” Mika & Canaan get to Phil at the Mat but are missing one person, and Phil tells them they can’t be checked in until they have their whole group. Canaan dashes off to look and finds her on the steps to the Shrine and carries her up, getting them tenth place. Maria & Tiffany, after spending a huge amount of time looking for their strays, decide to go check in because they can’t “keep dragging these people all over Tokyo.” They get 2-hour penalty from Phil for not completing the challenge, but are told it’s a non-elimination round. Lucky!!!!! They do, however, have to complete a Speed Bump on the next leg of the Race.
On to hour two of the premiere! Meghan & Cheyne leave the Shrine at 12:19 AM, and their clue tells them to "fly to Ho Chi Mihn City, Vietnam, and then hop a bus to the city of Cai Be. Once there, they had to race on foot to the Ben Tau Du Lich boat docks."
Most of the teams use the internet to book their flights, but Meghan & Cheyne, Gary & Matt, Brian & Ericka and Maria & Tiffany all went straight to the airport, finding out at the ticket counter that all the economy seats were sold. Maria & Tiffany arrived last and jumped in at the ticket counter, prompting Lance to say “the bastards should have been sent home.” (Lance is giving attorneys a bad name. He’s kind of an ass). Brian & Ericka beg the ticket agent to let them buy economy seats but get business seats, and the ticket agent gives in and gets them on the same flight as the other teams. As they’re standing in line to board, a guy recognizes Maria & Tiffany and asks them if they play poker. They say yes but Dan & Sam overhear and know the don’t work at a nonprofit homeless shelter. At the desk, Sam & Dan have matching passport folders and Maria & Tiffany remark about them. They offer that their sister bought the folders for them, and the girls tell them “we’re trying to figure out if you’re gay or not.” The guys have no plans to tell them they are gay because they want to be able to use the women’s flirty attitudes to their advantage. We’ll see how that works, considering the girls’ poker playing is now out of the bag!
Once in Vietnam, Sam & Dan and Marie & Tiffany get in the same van/cab. In their cab, the Globetrotters remark that they’ve found out that Maria & Tiffany are not nonprofit workers. “Don’t feel sorry for them any more. Game on.” In the city, there is water (LOTS of water!) all through the streets. The teams really want to get to the bus station, because the first bus leaves at 3:30, but the second didn’t leave until 4:45. Maria & Tiffany, Sam & Dan, Flight Time & Big Easy, Mika & Canaan, and Marcy & Ron all got on the first bus. Matt saw the bus leaving and told the remaining teams that they weren’t on the first bus and weren’t scheduled to leave for another hour and a half, and some real smart thinking started kicking in. They ended up pooling their money and kicked in $100 per team to get the bus to leave right away. The driver agreed and the bus took off. Zev, showing empathy for a freezing, wet local, gave the guy his jacket. The buses arrive at the boat dock but it doesn’t open till 7 AM, and all the teams catch up and realize they have to spend the night outside the gate - at least they all got lawn chairs!
When the gates opened at 7:00 a.m. the teams got their clues, which told them to: “Race through the Mekong Delta using sampans to get to nearby mud pits located along the water. Then, working together, they had to collect the nutrient-rich mud, carry it to a nearby orchard, and use it to fertilize a fruit tree. Once they covered the tree’s root system up to the designated red line, the farmer would hand them their next clue.”
Maria & Tiffany, however, get their Speed Bump in their clue. “They needed to find a soup stand and order the ingredients for a traditional Vietnamese soup known as pho. When they returned to the dock, they had to combine the ingredients and serve the soup to the dock master’s liking in order to receive their next clue.” Maria made the soup, saying that she “loves pho.” The dockmaster okays the soup and the girls dash off to get their clue and follow the other teams.
Cheyne jumps out of the sampan and gets stuck in thigh-deep mud. It was pretty funny watching all the teams slipping all over the place. Everyone was slipping in mud and getting filthy. Ericka says the mud was “like, sensual.” Meghan & Cheyne get done first and get their next clue, but Meghan falls into the boat being all slicked up with mud. Their clue tells them to return their boats to the dock and travel by foot to the Cai Be Field. We get our many shots of the locals laughing at these silly Americans. Justin finishes up and goes to get their pouch and falls into the river. As Justin & Zev take off, they look for their clue and can’t find it. They have to turn back and luckily manage to find it just as Maria & Tiffany get done with the task.
Meghan & Cheyne open their clue and find a Roadblock: Who’s feeling just ducky? “In it, one team member, using only two flags as a guide, had to herd a group of 150 ducks, which are used in Vietnamese farms to rid rice patties of damaging insects, out of their pen, across a bridge and back again, and then return them to their pen. If teams didn’t complete the task within the 10-minute time limit, they would relinquish their spot and wait for another available course.” Meghan and Jessica go first, trying to corral the ducks, and the guys stand on the side laughing. Ericka and Matt try the challenge, and Matt is doing great. Flight Time tries his hand at the ducks. Meghan isn’t done in ten minutes and has to wait for another turn; Jessica didn’t do it either. Sam & Dan breeze through the task and get done first. Their clue tells them to “race on foot to Cho Cai Be, a market at the edge of the Mekong River. Once there, they would have to search along the dock for the Bassac III, a riverboat, and the Pit Stop for this leg of the race.”
Gary and Matt finish the challenge, but Ericka fails when she gets a bunch of ducks back in the pen in but didn’t shut the gate going after the other ones so they get out again. Ericka runs out of time. Tiffany says she owned ducks, so she’s the good person for this one. Zev does this task, saying “we saw everyone freaking out, and that’s not the way to do it.” He has such great luck herding the ducks, Justin says that Zev is the “Duck Whisperer.” Mika is having major problems and doesn’t do it in time. Canaan (ever supportive) says “I want to rip her head off right now.”
Sam & Dan are trying to figure out how to get to the riverboat, and arguing as they go. “Both of us are trying to take a leadership role.” (Too many chiefs....) Gary & Matt keep calm and find the boat first, meeting Phil at the Mat in first place.
Back at the ducks, Jessica ran out of time again, then Ericka had to wait for a third try too. Garrett is getting frustrated, saying Jessica won’t listen to him and he can’t calm her down. Jessica finally calms down and gets better results. Ericka runs around chasing the ducks, saying “I’m eating ducks for dinner.”
The teams show up at the Mat to a smiling Phil:
1 - Gary & Matt
2 - Sam & Dan
3 - Big Easy & Flight Time
4 - Lance & Keri
5 - Zev & Justin
6 - Meghan & Cheyne
7 - Maria & Tiffany
8 - Mika & Canaan
9 - Marcy & Ron
10 - Brian & Ericka
11 - Garrett & Jessica - eliminated
Wow, a lot of lead changes in this one! Each team has its strengths - let’s see who comes in first next week!
Monday, September 28, 2009
Sunday, September 27, 2009
The Amazing Race 15 Has Started. Season Premiere on Right Now
The Amazing Race 15 Premieres September 27, 2009, on CBS.
The season of Amazing Race 15 has started. I am watching the 2 Hour season premiere right now.
Anyone else watching this? Any thoughts?
The season of Amazing Race 15 has started. I am watching the 2 Hour season premiere right now.
Anyone else watching this? Any thoughts?
Monday, May 11, 2009
Tammy & Victor Win the Million!
Last night’s finale had lead changes, sure winners turned losers, and a dead pig. What more could you ask for the last episode of Amazing Race? Tammy & Victor pull out the victory for the million dollars, leaving Jamie & Cara in second and Margie & Luke to get third (although the Mom and Son were in first place throughout this whole leg of the Race, till the last challenge). Let's get on with it....
The teams get directions to go to their final destination of Maui, Hawaii. There is only one flight from China to Hawaii at 9:30 a.m. the following day and all teams are on it. There’s the mad dash out of the airport, and Margie & Luke plead with their cabbie to go fast - and he answers "That’s illegal, ma’am, we can’t do that." I’m thinking this is a hint of things to come - cab trouble for everyone where there is no language barrier. Cosmic justice, maybe?
The clue has directed them to go to Beach Access 118 and "prep a pig for a traditional Hawaiian by seasoning it with island flavoring. Then, they would have to carry the 145-pound pig 200 yards across the beach to the luau. Finally, using an example for reference, they had to properly cover the pig to be cooked." Cara & Jamie thrilled their cabbie by changing into their bathing suits in the back of the cab, telling him he’d get a big tip if he went fast. (I think his tip was watching them change into their bikinis!) Tammy & Victor were in first place, prepping their pig as the Redheads showed up. However, both Tammy and Cara had major problems carrying their end of the load, dropping the pig several times on the beach. The difference was the teams’ approaches: Victor kept shouting encouragement to his sister, saying "You can do it! You’re better than you think! Just three more steps!" Jamie, ever empathetic, shouted at Cara too, but like she yelled at the oh-so-many cab drivers throughout the Race: "This is the way to lose a million dollars. You’re frickin’ killing me! I don’t understand what the problem is!" (Did you know Jamie will be a motivational speaker? Her lectures will be entitled "Coddle Your Kids No More, Success Through Intimidation!")
Margie & Luke showed up at the beach and prepped their pig, put the pole through its legs, and lifted the pig up onto their shoulders and started after the two teams ahead of them. While you know their shoulders were in pain, that’s the only way to carry something really heavy and they passed both teams pretty easily. (And while my fondness for Luke waned as the season went on, my admiration for Margie kept going up. That woman is 51 years old! She dashed all over the world, pulled rickshaws in stifling heat, and carried her load of a 145-pound dead-weight pig, among other things. I’m her age and I got tired just watching her!) They buried the pig properly and got their next clue, which told them to go to McGregor Point Beach and swim out to a jet ski, take a one-mile trip to a cluster of 100 buoys, and find the one with their next clue attached to it. Luke annoyed me to no end, sitting behind his Mom and constantly yammering at her, being a backseat driver. Margie was getting pretty irritated too, to the point where I thought she may actually smack him upside the head into the water and finish the task on her own. They ended up falling off their jet ski but the other teams were just getting to the beach and it didn’t really hurt their lead. Both Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie had covered their pig the wrong way, putting the palm fronds on top of the pig and then covering it with a cloth and sand, when the fronds were supposed to be on the very top of the pig, cloth and sand. (I love roast pig, but I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have wanted to eat one of those, after it was dropped in the sand and surf multiple times, and covered, uncovered and covered again.) We even got the shot of the locals laughing at the way they screwed up covering the pigs.
Tammy & Victor, with Cara & Jamie behind them, passed Margie & Luke coming back from the buoys. Cara & Jamie found their clue first but Tammy & Victor were close behind.
Margie & Luke opened their clue, finding out they had to drive down the Hana Highway and find a fence made of used surfboards, where their next clue would be. Their cab driver knew exactly where it was, and lengthened their lead. Their clue was the final Roadblock of the Race: "In it, one team member had to overcome three weeks worth of physical and mental fatigue and remember everything they had done on the race. Teams had to search through a pile of over 300 vintage surfboards to find 11 that have pictures related to the things they’ve encountered on the prior 11 legs of the race. Then, they had to create a surfboard fence by standing the boards up in the correct order according to their pictures." Since this task, in some form, has been used in every season of The Amazing Race, Luke had been reviewing their destinations and memorizing where they’d been. Margie said Luke had a great memory, and along with his studies along the way, he should have a fairly easy time with this task. (Kiss of Death!) Running back and forth, Luke’s shorts kept falling down, so he kicked them off and continued working on the task in his underwear. Luke quickly found boards and propped them up, seeming to have this task in the bag. Margie kept yelling, "Go Luke! Good!" as if he could hear her, which I found amusing.
In the meantime, the other two teams were having cab problems on their way to the surfboard fence. Tammy & Victor got stuck behind a slow-moving Jeep and their cab driver just puttered along behind him, not passing the Jeep. Cara & Jamie’s cab driver first took them to the wrong location, and calling his dispatcher for help didn’t work. Hearing Jamie doing her usual nasty berating, the dispatcher said "You need to tell your people I am not their personal concierge and cannot find the place for her." The Redheads borrowed their driver’s phone and called the police department to ask where the location was and surprisingly got directions (obviously it was a pretty slow crime day in Maui!) To make matters worse, their cab needed to stop for gas.
Victor volunteers for this Roadblock and ends up kicking his pants off too, saying he still has his Speedo on (I guess he wanted to make sure that people knew it wasn’t his underwear. Maybe his parents would be shamed beyond repair if their son ran around in his underwear on TV). As Victor started the task, Luke put his last boards in place and had the girl check his work - but board numbers 10 and 11 were wrong. (Of course, all the girl could tell him was that it was incorrect, not which ones were incorrect.) He searched through the boards as Victor slowly caught up. By this time, Jaime had joined the others and had started her fence. Luke got #10 right but couldn’t find the proper board for the 11th spot (and how he could remember all the legs that easily, in their proper order, but not the very last one amazed me). He started getting frustrated which gave Victor the chance to pull ahead and get their clue, telling them to go to the King Kamehameha Golf Club and the finish line.
Jamie and Luke were pretty much in the same boat, with Jamie not finding #1 and Luke still having problems with #11. Margie suggested they work together, and on the surface it seemed that doing so may cost them dearly if they helped the other team get ahead, depending on the cab ride. However, considering Tammy & Victor were already gone, it only made sense to get it over with and give one of the remaining teams a chance to beat them. Luke told Jamie what she was missing and Jamie then turned her boards over one by one showing Luke what she had. Cara & Jamie then got their clue and took off, with Margie & Luke right behind them. The cab rides were no fun, with Jamie berating herself for not remembering the church at the beginning, and Luke feeling bad to have lost his lead. Cara was too sweet to Jamie (after all the screeching Jamie did at Cara with the pig) and it was very touching to see Margie reassure Luke as only a mother can!
Tammy & Victor ran through the cheering eliminated teams to the Mat and first place. Victor got teary-eyed, hugging his sister, and Tammy just looked shell-shocked. Phil asked her what she was thinking, and all Tammy could say was "I have no pants on!" When Cara & Jamie got to the Mat in second, Jamie cried that she messed up but Cara told her that she was proud of Jamie and "proud of us. We finished The Amazing Race!" Luke told Phil that he was lucky to have Margie as his Mom.
So there goes another season! Are you happy the siblings won? Were you rooting for the first female team to win, finally, or did Jamie's attitude blow any fans who might root for them? Did Luke irritate you too?
The show has been picked up by CBS for another run, and we’ll look forward to it in the fall! Have a great summer, everyone!
The teams get directions to go to their final destination of Maui, Hawaii. There is only one flight from China to Hawaii at 9:30 a.m. the following day and all teams are on it. There’s the mad dash out of the airport, and Margie & Luke plead with their cabbie to go fast - and he answers "That’s illegal, ma’am, we can’t do that." I’m thinking this is a hint of things to come - cab trouble for everyone where there is no language barrier. Cosmic justice, maybe?
The clue has directed them to go to Beach Access 118 and "prep a pig for a traditional Hawaiian by seasoning it with island flavoring. Then, they would have to carry the 145-pound pig 200 yards across the beach to the luau. Finally, using an example for reference, they had to properly cover the pig to be cooked." Cara & Jamie thrilled their cabbie by changing into their bathing suits in the back of the cab, telling him he’d get a big tip if he went fast. (I think his tip was watching them change into their bikinis!) Tammy & Victor were in first place, prepping their pig as the Redheads showed up. However, both Tammy and Cara had major problems carrying their end of the load, dropping the pig several times on the beach. The difference was the teams’ approaches: Victor kept shouting encouragement to his sister, saying "You can do it! You’re better than you think! Just three more steps!" Jamie, ever empathetic, shouted at Cara too, but like she yelled at the oh-so-many cab drivers throughout the Race: "This is the way to lose a million dollars. You’re frickin’ killing me! I don’t understand what the problem is!" (Did you know Jamie will be a motivational speaker? Her lectures will be entitled "Coddle Your Kids No More, Success Through Intimidation!")
Margie & Luke showed up at the beach and prepped their pig, put the pole through its legs, and lifted the pig up onto their shoulders and started after the two teams ahead of them. While you know their shoulders were in pain, that’s the only way to carry something really heavy and they passed both teams pretty easily. (And while my fondness for Luke waned as the season went on, my admiration for Margie kept going up. That woman is 51 years old! She dashed all over the world, pulled rickshaws in stifling heat, and carried her load of a 145-pound dead-weight pig, among other things. I’m her age and I got tired just watching her!) They buried the pig properly and got their next clue, which told them to go to McGregor Point Beach and swim out to a jet ski, take a one-mile trip to a cluster of 100 buoys, and find the one with their next clue attached to it. Luke annoyed me to no end, sitting behind his Mom and constantly yammering at her, being a backseat driver. Margie was getting pretty irritated too, to the point where I thought she may actually smack him upside the head into the water and finish the task on her own. They ended up falling off their jet ski but the other teams were just getting to the beach and it didn’t really hurt their lead. Both Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie had covered their pig the wrong way, putting the palm fronds on top of the pig and then covering it with a cloth and sand, when the fronds were supposed to be on the very top of the pig, cloth and sand. (I love roast pig, but I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have wanted to eat one of those, after it was dropped in the sand and surf multiple times, and covered, uncovered and covered again.) We even got the shot of the locals laughing at the way they screwed up covering the pigs.
Tammy & Victor, with Cara & Jamie behind them, passed Margie & Luke coming back from the buoys. Cara & Jamie found their clue first but Tammy & Victor were close behind.
Margie & Luke opened their clue, finding out they had to drive down the Hana Highway and find a fence made of used surfboards, where their next clue would be. Their cab driver knew exactly where it was, and lengthened their lead. Their clue was the final Roadblock of the Race: "In it, one team member had to overcome three weeks worth of physical and mental fatigue and remember everything they had done on the race. Teams had to search through a pile of over 300 vintage surfboards to find 11 that have pictures related to the things they’ve encountered on the prior 11 legs of the race. Then, they had to create a surfboard fence by standing the boards up in the correct order according to their pictures." Since this task, in some form, has been used in every season of The Amazing Race, Luke had been reviewing their destinations and memorizing where they’d been. Margie said Luke had a great memory, and along with his studies along the way, he should have a fairly easy time with this task. (Kiss of Death!) Running back and forth, Luke’s shorts kept falling down, so he kicked them off and continued working on the task in his underwear. Luke quickly found boards and propped them up, seeming to have this task in the bag. Margie kept yelling, "Go Luke! Good!" as if he could hear her, which I found amusing.
In the meantime, the other two teams were having cab problems on their way to the surfboard fence. Tammy & Victor got stuck behind a slow-moving Jeep and their cab driver just puttered along behind him, not passing the Jeep. Cara & Jamie’s cab driver first took them to the wrong location, and calling his dispatcher for help didn’t work. Hearing Jamie doing her usual nasty berating, the dispatcher said "You need to tell your people I am not their personal concierge and cannot find the place for her." The Redheads borrowed their driver’s phone and called the police department to ask where the location was and surprisingly got directions (obviously it was a pretty slow crime day in Maui!) To make matters worse, their cab needed to stop for gas.
Victor volunteers for this Roadblock and ends up kicking his pants off too, saying he still has his Speedo on (I guess he wanted to make sure that people knew it wasn’t his underwear. Maybe his parents would be shamed beyond repair if their son ran around in his underwear on TV). As Victor started the task, Luke put his last boards in place and had the girl check his work - but board numbers 10 and 11 were wrong. (Of course, all the girl could tell him was that it was incorrect, not which ones were incorrect.) He searched through the boards as Victor slowly caught up. By this time, Jaime had joined the others and had started her fence. Luke got #10 right but couldn’t find the proper board for the 11th spot (and how he could remember all the legs that easily, in their proper order, but not the very last one amazed me). He started getting frustrated which gave Victor the chance to pull ahead and get their clue, telling them to go to the King Kamehameha Golf Club and the finish line.
Jamie and Luke were pretty much in the same boat, with Jamie not finding #1 and Luke still having problems with #11. Margie suggested they work together, and on the surface it seemed that doing so may cost them dearly if they helped the other team get ahead, depending on the cab ride. However, considering Tammy & Victor were already gone, it only made sense to get it over with and give one of the remaining teams a chance to beat them. Luke told Jamie what she was missing and Jamie then turned her boards over one by one showing Luke what she had. Cara & Jamie then got their clue and took off, with Margie & Luke right behind them. The cab rides were no fun, with Jamie berating herself for not remembering the church at the beginning, and Luke feeling bad to have lost his lead. Cara was too sweet to Jamie (after all the screeching Jamie did at Cara with the pig) and it was very touching to see Margie reassure Luke as only a mother can!
Tammy & Victor ran through the cheering eliminated teams to the Mat and first place. Victor got teary-eyed, hugging his sister, and Tammy just looked shell-shocked. Phil asked her what she was thinking, and all Tammy could say was "I have no pants on!" When Cara & Jamie got to the Mat in second, Jamie cried that she messed up but Cara told her that she was proud of Jamie and "proud of us. We finished The Amazing Race!" Luke told Phil that he was lucky to have Margie as his Mom.
So there goes another season! Are you happy the siblings won? Were you rooting for the first female team to win, finally, or did Jamie's attitude blow any fans who might root for them? Did Luke irritate you too?
The show has been picked up by CBS for another run, and we’ll look forward to it in the fall! Have a great summer, everyone!
Monday, May 4, 2009
A Bathroom Stop Loses the Million for Kisha & Jen
Our final three teams are set! Kisha & Jen were ahead of the snotty, bitchy redheads but Jen absolutely had to go to the bathroom and the redheads managed to beat them to the Mat by seconds. Gotta wonder if Jen regretted stopping to pee (as opposed to wetting herself on national television) - that was a million-dollar tinkle!
So here’s how it went down....
As we saw last week, poor Jamie & Cara (and I say that loosely, they are my team in the office pool but they really tick me off) were bummed at the Mat when Phil handed them a clue and told them to keep racing. The clue told them to go to Bai Hai Dong Men and find the clue box there. The cosmic gods were smiling as Jamie opened the cab door, bent down to get something on the ground, and the door swung shut on her head. (If the cab drivers can’t be nasty, the vehicles will take care of it!) They got to the clue box there just as Margie & Luke arrived at the Mat and Phil handed them their clue. Victor & Tammy were just as surprised and Kisha & Jen were both surprised and ecstatic, expecting to be eliminated and getting a clue from Phil to keep going. They jumped in a cab and Kisha tried to pronounce their destination to the driver, who cracked up at her attempt. Kisha laughed and said "Hey, I tried!"
Once at Bai Hai Dong Men (and just for the heck of it, I checked the translation. Bai is "100" - Hai is "still in progress" or "ocean/sea" - Dong is "to use" or "east" - and Men is "gate or door." So they went to the Hundred Ocean East Gate. Or the Hundred Still in Progress to Use the Door...) the clue told them to search the shops on the street and find a Travelocity Roaming Gnome statue. Travelocity must pay a fortune for this product placement, they get special camera shots and are drug all over by the teams. Cara & Jamie had problems finding the gnome and Tammy & Victor and Margie & Luke caught up and they all searched the shops together. Margie & Luke found the gnome first and read the clue on the bottom to go to Gu Gong Xi Bei Jiao (and no, I’m not looking that one up) and find electric bicycles. Cara & Jamie managed to find their gnome and joined Margie & Luke in looking for a cab. Tammy & Victor passed a gnome up in a clothing shop as Kisha & Jen got to the location and started looking. Tammy & Victor finally find the statue and hop into a cab (here’s where their knowledge of the language really helped them) and by then, Margie & Luke have found a cab as well. Cara & Jamie manage to get a cab but Jamie doesn’t make friends - again - because she shoved the gnome (with the location of their destination printed on the bottom) in the front seat of the cab, scaring the driver. (She’s lucky he didn’t toss her out of the cab at that point). She kept haranguing the driver "do you know where this is? Do you? Just say yes or no!" Ya gotta wonder how she is at any businesses, like, say a fast-food restaurant drive-thru. Sometimes you can’t tell if it’s English being spoken through those speakers, and I can just see Jamie screeching at the clown face trying to order. "Cheeseburger! Why is it so hard to understand? Doesn’t anyone speak English any more??!!"
Tammy & Victor get to the bicycles first and take off to ride through the Forbidden City and across Tiananmen Square on their way to Dongdan subway station. I guess they didn’t see the part in their clue that said "electric" bicycles because they started pedaling before Tammy noticed there were controls on her handlebars allowing her to coast.
The clue at the subway station was a Detour: Beijing Opera or Chinese Waiter. In Beijing Opera, teams had to travel to the Hu Guang Hui Guan Opera House where they would make each other up as a princess and gentleman at the Chinese opera. After being fully made up and costumed, they had to present themselves to the opera master to receive their next clue. In Chinese Waiter, teams had to travel to Hu Guang Hui Guan restaurant and select a table of hungry patrons. The customers would give their orders in Mandarin and teams would have to recite the orders back to the chef. When they recited the orders correctly, the kitchen staff would prepare the dishes. When all of the dishes had been served, teams would receive their next clue.
Of course, Tammy & Victor relished the thought of using their language skills to fly through the Chinese Waiter challenge. As they ran into the restaurant, Victor joked "If we can’t do this task Mom and Dad will kill us." They did great, on the first try they got four out of five orders correct - they translated "good luck fish" to "good luck squid" and had to try again. The second time, Victor told Tammy "you say it" and then talked right along with her. I thought you were going to back off a little, big brother! They were right this time and served their food, getting their next clue.
In the meantime, Kisha & Jen decided to go to the Beijing Opera. Kisha told Jen she wanted to be the princess because "I’ve never been a princess in my life." Jen put the makeup on Kisha who said "I look like a damn clown" and Jen added, "You’re gonna scare a lot of children." Margie & Luke showed up shortly after and Luke began making up his mother, and doing an awful job of it. He overdid the powder (and Margie’s gonna get lung cancer because of it - who knows how much lead is in that powder, not to mention that snorting it can’t be good for you) and Margie kept trying to correct him. Doing her eyebrows black, Luke made them so thick she started looking like Groucho Marx. The pink eyeshadow also didn’t go well, and Margie thought she looked like Alice Cooper, and then a drag queen (which was appropriate!) Luke got sick of Margie telling him what to do and finally said "I’m finished." He settled down, though and finished the "makeup" job.
Cara & Jamie are having problems with the cab driver once again, explaining that they needed to go to the Opera House by singing opera to him. They got their point across - sort of. He dropped them off at the National Opera and the woman inside read their clue, telling them they needed to go to the Beijing Opera. Tsk, tsk, foiled by another cab driver who doesn’t like being yelled at like he’s a total idiot.
Tammy & Victor opened their clue which told them to go on foot to Wen Chang Ge. Asking a local, he pointed to the building they just came out of, so they went into another door and there was the U-Turn. This one wasn’t blind, so they U-Turned Kisha & Jen and wrote a note to them on the picture: "Sorry! We can’t outrun you!!" Now that’s the way to U-Turn someone, using it not only to delay your toughest competitors (although KIsha & Jen only came in first place one time, as opposed to Margie & Luke) but apologize while you’re at it. It seemed no matter what team got there first, Kisha & Jen were doomed because the other two teams wanted to U-Turn them as well (although Margie & Luke made it personal, which was getting a bit tiring listening to them harp about Kisha & Jen through this whole leg of the Race). The clue told Tammy & Victor to go to Dong Hua Men Yi Shi Market for their next clue.
Kisha & Jen took a bow on the opera stage and got their next clue. They started wandering the streets to look for Wen Chang Ge, and were shortly joined by Margie & Luke. It seemed none of the locals knew where they should go so the teams pretty much wandered the streets asking anyone who would listen where this place was. As Victor noted at the restaurant, the slightest inflection can change a word, so their pronunciation of "Wen Chang Ge" could have translated to "I Want Sex" or "You Are Ugly" and they could have been walking around insulting an entire nation. Any wonder why they couldn’t get anyone to help direct them?
Back at the National Opera, Cara & Jamie are having problems - again - getting a cab. If it weren’t so obnoxious, Jamie’s hissy fits would actually be funny. But again, she’s promoting the "angry American" stereotype better than anyone on earth!
Victor & Tammy get to the market to find a Roadblock. In it, one team member had to eat a plate of fried Chinese delicacies including grasshoppers, larvae, scorpions, and starfish. Once they finished their plate, teams would receive their next clue. Victor grabbed his plateful and was going to start eating when the counter guy caught him, saying "we have to fry it first." (I would think it’s bad enough fried, but eating it raw? Oh, gross. I was laughing with friends yesterday about how deep frying makes anything taste good, but we’ll have to ask Victor if that counts for larvae as much as it counts for cauliflower). Victor started munching away, saying that it was "hard to keep down." He did really well with the mind-over-matter attitude, telling Tammy not to remind him that it should be gross and munching away. (I’m getting queasy again, I really don’t like these kind of challenges, eating bugs and camel noses and stuff.)
Cara & Jamie are still trying to find a taxi, now accusing that "they know the word "taxi," they just play dumb." I’m thinking by this time, all the cabbies in China have spread the word that the two American redheads are total bitches and "whatever you do, don’t pick them up." They did manage to find a cab (probably a brand-new driver, and we know the new guy always gets screwed) and get to the Opera, get their makeup and costumes on and get their clue. Margie & Luke and Kisha & Jen were still wandering the streets. Margie & Luke got a local to walk with them, ending up pretty much back where they started and finding the U-Turn. They took off for the Market as Kisha & Jen decided to go back to the beginning and retrace their steps, and finding their destination and noticing that they’d been U-Turned by Tammy & Victor. I give them credit for not getting snarky about it, just deciding to get the task over with and keep plugging along.
It was hysterical, seeing what Kisha & Jen’s pronunciations of the dishes translated to"
Monthly Use Taiwanese Chicken., Good Western Heads Lack Fish, Oil Comes Again to Please the Mouth, Good Doll Basket Drum, Light Competition Red Dishes I’ve Played Before. I’m sure the chef finally let them think they got it right - Mandarin Chinese is one of the hardest languages on earth (see Victor’s comment) and I honestly believe that Kisha & Jen could still be there now, pronouncing stuff over and over again and never getting it right. (Although I’m sure the translations would be a good laugh - to me, anyway.)
Cara & Jamie are still wandering the streets, snarking at locals who don’t speak English and now beginning to snark at each other. Jamie decided "China sucks!" The arguments started when they decided to go back to the Opera House and start all over, then found the U-Turn easily and Jamie jumped all over Cara that it was her fault they didn’t find it sooner.
Tammy & Victor were told to go to Niao Chao, which was the "bird’s nest" building during the Olympics and was the next Pit Stop. Having been at the Olympics Tammy & Victor made it easily and arrived at the Mat in first place.
Margie decided to do the Roadblock at the Market, asking the counter guy to fry her critters "extra crispy please!" Margie finished her "delicacies" and they got to the Mat in second place. (One thing I noticed - Phil signs at the Mat for Luke, which is nice, but he also talks a lot louder, like Luke will be able to hear him).
Kisha & Jen get to the Market and Jen starts eating. Kisha asks her "Does it taste like chicken?" but Jen doesn’t look too pleased, sucking water with each bite of "food" so she can wash it down. Cara & Jamie showed up, starting to feel like they have a shot. Cara sees Jen eating slow and starts chowing, slamming the food in her mouth and chewing quickly. Seeing Jen get sick, Jamie eggs Cara on, telling her "you’re an animal!" and "you’re eating it like it’s a steak!" Jen managed to finish and they got their clue, but Jamie kept Cara motivated, telling her the sisters couldn’t find a cab, "we’re still in this." Jen mentions that she has to pee really bad after drinking four bottles of water to choke down the food. She says "Jen about to run a 100 in nine seconds cuz she got to pee." Looking really pained at the Bird’s Nest, Kisha spots some porta potties and Jen rushes into one. This was her million-dollar decision, because Cara & Jamie used that opportunity to beat them to the Mat by seconds. Phil, trying to be cute, said "I’m sorry to tell you ... you’re going to have to keep racing." (And Phil? They wouldn't be sorry to keep racing for a million bucks!)
So Kisha & Jen got eliminated, and Jen said, "I feel guilty. I had to use the bathroom." Kisha disagreed, saying they didn’t lose because of her little sister but "she’s a big part of why we got this far." And the debates started in every household watching the show - should she have peed in her Chinese costume and gone for the million?
So the finale is next week - who will manage to take first? The previews showed Cara & Jamie and Victor & Tammy in bikinis on a Hawaiian beach, trying to carry a dead pig on a stick. I’m hoping Margie won’t be wearing a bikini.....
So here’s how it went down....
As we saw last week, poor Jamie & Cara (and I say that loosely, they are my team in the office pool but they really tick me off) were bummed at the Mat when Phil handed them a clue and told them to keep racing. The clue told them to go to Bai Hai Dong Men and find the clue box there. The cosmic gods were smiling as Jamie opened the cab door, bent down to get something on the ground, and the door swung shut on her head. (If the cab drivers can’t be nasty, the vehicles will take care of it!) They got to the clue box there just as Margie & Luke arrived at the Mat and Phil handed them their clue. Victor & Tammy were just as surprised and Kisha & Jen were both surprised and ecstatic, expecting to be eliminated and getting a clue from Phil to keep going. They jumped in a cab and Kisha tried to pronounce their destination to the driver, who cracked up at her attempt. Kisha laughed and said "Hey, I tried!"
Once at Bai Hai Dong Men (and just for the heck of it, I checked the translation. Bai is "100" - Hai is "still in progress" or "ocean/sea" - Dong is "to use" or "east" - and Men is "gate or door." So they went to the Hundred Ocean East Gate. Or the Hundred Still in Progress to Use the Door...) the clue told them to search the shops on the street and find a Travelocity Roaming Gnome statue. Travelocity must pay a fortune for this product placement, they get special camera shots and are drug all over by the teams. Cara & Jamie had problems finding the gnome and Tammy & Victor and Margie & Luke caught up and they all searched the shops together. Margie & Luke found the gnome first and read the clue on the bottom to go to Gu Gong Xi Bei Jiao (and no, I’m not looking that one up) and find electric bicycles. Cara & Jamie managed to find their gnome and joined Margie & Luke in looking for a cab. Tammy & Victor passed a gnome up in a clothing shop as Kisha & Jen got to the location and started looking. Tammy & Victor finally find the statue and hop into a cab (here’s where their knowledge of the language really helped them) and by then, Margie & Luke have found a cab as well. Cara & Jamie manage to get a cab but Jamie doesn’t make friends - again - because she shoved the gnome (with the location of their destination printed on the bottom) in the front seat of the cab, scaring the driver. (She’s lucky he didn’t toss her out of the cab at that point). She kept haranguing the driver "do you know where this is? Do you? Just say yes or no!" Ya gotta wonder how she is at any businesses, like, say a fast-food restaurant drive-thru. Sometimes you can’t tell if it’s English being spoken through those speakers, and I can just see Jamie screeching at the clown face trying to order. "Cheeseburger! Why is it so hard to understand? Doesn’t anyone speak English any more??!!"
Tammy & Victor get to the bicycles first and take off to ride through the Forbidden City and across Tiananmen Square on their way to Dongdan subway station. I guess they didn’t see the part in their clue that said "electric" bicycles because they started pedaling before Tammy noticed there were controls on her handlebars allowing her to coast.
The clue at the subway station was a Detour: Beijing Opera or Chinese Waiter. In Beijing Opera, teams had to travel to the Hu Guang Hui Guan Opera House where they would make each other up as a princess and gentleman at the Chinese opera. After being fully made up and costumed, they had to present themselves to the opera master to receive their next clue. In Chinese Waiter, teams had to travel to Hu Guang Hui Guan restaurant and select a table of hungry patrons. The customers would give their orders in Mandarin and teams would have to recite the orders back to the chef. When they recited the orders correctly, the kitchen staff would prepare the dishes. When all of the dishes had been served, teams would receive their next clue.
Of course, Tammy & Victor relished the thought of using their language skills to fly through the Chinese Waiter challenge. As they ran into the restaurant, Victor joked "If we can’t do this task Mom and Dad will kill us." They did great, on the first try they got four out of five orders correct - they translated "good luck fish" to "good luck squid" and had to try again. The second time, Victor told Tammy "you say it" and then talked right along with her. I thought you were going to back off a little, big brother! They were right this time and served their food, getting their next clue.
In the meantime, Kisha & Jen decided to go to the Beijing Opera. Kisha told Jen she wanted to be the princess because "I’ve never been a princess in my life." Jen put the makeup on Kisha who said "I look like a damn clown" and Jen added, "You’re gonna scare a lot of children." Margie & Luke showed up shortly after and Luke began making up his mother, and doing an awful job of it. He overdid the powder (and Margie’s gonna get lung cancer because of it - who knows how much lead is in that powder, not to mention that snorting it can’t be good for you) and Margie kept trying to correct him. Doing her eyebrows black, Luke made them so thick she started looking like Groucho Marx. The pink eyeshadow also didn’t go well, and Margie thought she looked like Alice Cooper, and then a drag queen (which was appropriate!) Luke got sick of Margie telling him what to do and finally said "I’m finished." He settled down, though and finished the "makeup" job.
Cara & Jamie are having problems with the cab driver once again, explaining that they needed to go to the Opera House by singing opera to him. They got their point across - sort of. He dropped them off at the National Opera and the woman inside read their clue, telling them they needed to go to the Beijing Opera. Tsk, tsk, foiled by another cab driver who doesn’t like being yelled at like he’s a total idiot.
Tammy & Victor opened their clue which told them to go on foot to Wen Chang Ge. Asking a local, he pointed to the building they just came out of, so they went into another door and there was the U-Turn. This one wasn’t blind, so they U-Turned Kisha & Jen and wrote a note to them on the picture: "Sorry! We can’t outrun you!!" Now that’s the way to U-Turn someone, using it not only to delay your toughest competitors (although KIsha & Jen only came in first place one time, as opposed to Margie & Luke) but apologize while you’re at it. It seemed no matter what team got there first, Kisha & Jen were doomed because the other two teams wanted to U-Turn them as well (although Margie & Luke made it personal, which was getting a bit tiring listening to them harp about Kisha & Jen through this whole leg of the Race). The clue told Tammy & Victor to go to Dong Hua Men Yi Shi Market for their next clue.
Kisha & Jen took a bow on the opera stage and got their next clue. They started wandering the streets to look for Wen Chang Ge, and were shortly joined by Margie & Luke. It seemed none of the locals knew where they should go so the teams pretty much wandered the streets asking anyone who would listen where this place was. As Victor noted at the restaurant, the slightest inflection can change a word, so their pronunciation of "Wen Chang Ge" could have translated to "I Want Sex" or "You Are Ugly" and they could have been walking around insulting an entire nation. Any wonder why they couldn’t get anyone to help direct them?
Back at the National Opera, Cara & Jamie are having problems - again - getting a cab. If it weren’t so obnoxious, Jamie’s hissy fits would actually be funny. But again, she’s promoting the "angry American" stereotype better than anyone on earth!
Victor & Tammy get to the market to find a Roadblock. In it, one team member had to eat a plate of fried Chinese delicacies including grasshoppers, larvae, scorpions, and starfish. Once they finished their plate, teams would receive their next clue. Victor grabbed his plateful and was going to start eating when the counter guy caught him, saying "we have to fry it first." (I would think it’s bad enough fried, but eating it raw? Oh, gross. I was laughing with friends yesterday about how deep frying makes anything taste good, but we’ll have to ask Victor if that counts for larvae as much as it counts for cauliflower). Victor started munching away, saying that it was "hard to keep down." He did really well with the mind-over-matter attitude, telling Tammy not to remind him that it should be gross and munching away. (I’m getting queasy again, I really don’t like these kind of challenges, eating bugs and camel noses and stuff.)
Cara & Jamie are still trying to find a taxi, now accusing that "they know the word "taxi," they just play dumb." I’m thinking by this time, all the cabbies in China have spread the word that the two American redheads are total bitches and "whatever you do, don’t pick them up." They did manage to find a cab (probably a brand-new driver, and we know the new guy always gets screwed) and get to the Opera, get their makeup and costumes on and get their clue. Margie & Luke and Kisha & Jen were still wandering the streets. Margie & Luke got a local to walk with them, ending up pretty much back where they started and finding the U-Turn. They took off for the Market as Kisha & Jen decided to go back to the beginning and retrace their steps, and finding their destination and noticing that they’d been U-Turned by Tammy & Victor. I give them credit for not getting snarky about it, just deciding to get the task over with and keep plugging along.
It was hysterical, seeing what Kisha & Jen’s pronunciations of the dishes translated to"
Monthly Use Taiwanese Chicken., Good Western Heads Lack Fish, Oil Comes Again to Please the Mouth, Good Doll Basket Drum, Light Competition Red Dishes I’ve Played Before. I’m sure the chef finally let them think they got it right - Mandarin Chinese is one of the hardest languages on earth (see Victor’s comment) and I honestly believe that Kisha & Jen could still be there now, pronouncing stuff over and over again and never getting it right. (Although I’m sure the translations would be a good laugh - to me, anyway.)
Cara & Jamie are still wandering the streets, snarking at locals who don’t speak English and now beginning to snark at each other. Jamie decided "China sucks!" The arguments started when they decided to go back to the Opera House and start all over, then found the U-Turn easily and Jamie jumped all over Cara that it was her fault they didn’t find it sooner.
Tammy & Victor were told to go to Niao Chao, which was the "bird’s nest" building during the Olympics and was the next Pit Stop. Having been at the Olympics Tammy & Victor made it easily and arrived at the Mat in first place.
Margie decided to do the Roadblock at the Market, asking the counter guy to fry her critters "extra crispy please!" Margie finished her "delicacies" and they got to the Mat in second place. (One thing I noticed - Phil signs at the Mat for Luke, which is nice, but he also talks a lot louder, like Luke will be able to hear him).
Kisha & Jen get to the Market and Jen starts eating. Kisha asks her "Does it taste like chicken?" but Jen doesn’t look too pleased, sucking water with each bite of "food" so she can wash it down. Cara & Jamie showed up, starting to feel like they have a shot. Cara sees Jen eating slow and starts chowing, slamming the food in her mouth and chewing quickly. Seeing Jen get sick, Jamie eggs Cara on, telling her "you’re an animal!" and "you’re eating it like it’s a steak!" Jen managed to finish and they got their clue, but Jamie kept Cara motivated, telling her the sisters couldn’t find a cab, "we’re still in this." Jen mentions that she has to pee really bad after drinking four bottles of water to choke down the food. She says "Jen about to run a 100 in nine seconds cuz she got to pee." Looking really pained at the Bird’s Nest, Kisha spots some porta potties and Jen rushes into one. This was her million-dollar decision, because Cara & Jamie used that opportunity to beat them to the Mat by seconds. Phil, trying to be cute, said "I’m sorry to tell you ... you’re going to have to keep racing." (And Phil? They wouldn't be sorry to keep racing for a million bucks!)
So Kisha & Jen got eliminated, and Jen said, "I feel guilty. I had to use the bathroom." Kisha disagreed, saying they didn’t lose because of her little sister but "she’s a big part of why we got this far." And the debates started in every household watching the show - should she have peed in her Chinese costume and gone for the million?
So the finale is next week - who will manage to take first? The previews showed Cara & Jamie and Victor & Tammy in bikinis on a Hawaiian beach, trying to carry a dead pig on a stick. I’m hoping Margie won’t be wearing a bikini.....
Monday, April 27, 2009
Not So Fast! First Place is Still an Illusion....
Wow! The Redheads Cara & Jamie were thinking that they finally managed to come in first place, and Phil hands them a clue and says "keep racing!" Lucky for Keisha & Jen, who had a major meltdown at a task, meaning they won’t be eliminated this leg and have a chance to catch up.
Our teams are told to fly to Beijing, China and find a foot massage spa. Tammy & Victor were excited since they were just to Beijing for the Olympics and had a familiarity with the city. After the Mat argument last week, Luke is saying "It’s done with Keisha & Jen. We’re going to finish in the final three and kick their ass." Margie & Luke get to the airport first and as Keisha & Jen wait behind them to book tickets, they all find out that particular counter doesn’t accept foreign credit cards. Margie gets upset and mumbles that Keisha & Jen get to the other counter first rather than "go in the order that they were there in the first place." It doesn’t matter in the end, as they are all on the same flight. Tammy & Victor, using their language skills, ask the seating agent to give them seats as far up front as possible and put the other teams as far back as possible (leaving the Redheads in the last row). Tammy mentioned that "we will bring shame to our family" if they didn’t make it through this leg of the Race.
Once in Beijing, Luke and Keisha bumped into each other as they were running for taxis, but luckily nothing came out of that - I’m sure neither wanted to end up arrested in China for fighting at the airport. Keisha & Jen ended up with a slow cab driver and Cara & Jamie passed them up, even though they were the last off the plane after being stuck way in the back. Tammy remarked that she didn’t like feet, and was hoping that the task at the foot massage spa didn’t involve having to give foot rubs. Cara & Jamie make it to the spa first and find a Road Block. "One team member had to first drink a Chinese medicinal tea. Then, they would sit back and "enjoy" a foot massage, known for its therapeutic powers, which walked the fine line between pleasure and pain and lasted ten minutes. If the racer could endure the therapeutic massage for the entire ten minutes, they had to drink another cup of tea to receive their next clue. However, if the pain was too intense, the racer could say, "Uncle", to stop the massage, but if they did, they had to restart the massage from the beginning." Cara wasn’t thrilled with anyone touching her feet but I’m sure she would have welcomed a regular foot massage over what was to come. She was reduced to tears, squirming all over the chair as Jamie threatened her not to say "uncle." Keisha had to bite on her jacket to get through the "massage." As Tammy went in and saw the two of them, she asked "is it really that bad?" and Cara told her "having a baby has to be easier than this!" After a few minutes Tammy admitted that she’d much rather mess with someone else’s feet than endure the pain. Luke overruled Margie, who offered to do the task, and was sorry, signing "ow" over and over again. He and Tammy ended up holding hands for courage, and after Tammy left, he bit on his cap to get through the rest. (I don't even want to know what the "happy ending" at this spa was!!! Plus, the shots of the local spa ladies grinning creeped me out.)
The teams had trouble finding a taxi to take them to the Guangcai Natatorium which allowed Margie & Luke to catch up. Keisha & Jen were first to leave, and Cara & Jamie were going for the same cab as Tammy & Victor, who were telling the cab driver where they needed to go. Jamie bulldozed her way to the cab, telling Tammy "not this time, sister," and Tammy decided to let it go because "Jamie scares me." (All Tammy would have to do is scream in Chinese that Jamie had a gun or drugs and she’d be a bit delayed, I’d think! Of course, I can only imagine the penalty Phil would give her for that....)
At the Natatorium, Tammy & Victor get there first and get the clue, which is a Detour - Sync or Swim. "In Sync, teams would try to master the skill of synchronized diving by jumping off the three-meter springboard and hitting the water in perfect unison. When they performed a jump where they hit the water simultaneously, and received a passing score of five from the judges, they would receive their next clue. In Swim, teams had to change into the revolutionary Speedo laser suit, the same type of suit worn by Michael Phelps when he won 8 gold medals at the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games. Then, they had to swim eight lengths of the pool in a 400-meter relay with team members alternating every two lengths, and competing against Michael Phelps’ time of 04:03.84 in the individual medley. While teams did not have to beat Phelps’ time, each team member had to complete 200 meters of the relay to receive their next clue."
Tammy & Victor decide to try the diving after watching a diver bounce twice on the board and jump in feet first, thinking it would be easier than the swimming. Victor looked embarrassed walking out of the locker room with the bathing suit they gave him, a little Speedo, saying "this is skimpy." It was funny watching them try to "dive" in unison - they were getting scores of 1's and 2's - they couldn’t even jump off the boards at the same time! Keisha & Jen had gotten there by this time and decided to try the diving because Jen had a huge fear of water and figured this would be easier to take than swimming. Jen walked out to the edge of the board and said "I can’t do this" so they decided to switch tasks. As they changed into the laser swimsuits, Keisha mentioned that "I don’t think these are made for someone with these thighs," trying hard to squeeze into the suit. She jumped in first to swim the first leg, and while I thought she was taking so long and grabbing onto the lane markers on the way back, I realized she was doing that after about 10 meters (which isn’t like a skip in the park, but c’mon already!) I was a swimmer in high school, but we swam yards - when I got to college I visited the pool and jumped in to do a few laps, and realized it was a meter pool - and meters are much longer than I expected! Still, the teams were not expected to go fast or look pretty doing it, or not even stick to one stroke (they could dog paddle if they wanted). After her first lap, Jen convinced Keisha to go back to the diving board for another crack at that.
Cara & Jamie had decided to do the swim, and while they weren’t anywhere near graceful in the water, they kept at it and finished the 400 meters in 9:53. They got their clue and were told to head to the Pit Stop at Drum Tower. They were excited, thinking that this was finally the leg they could come in first, but knowing that they’ve been first to leave tasks before and something always managed to screw them up like bad drivers or directions kept them anxious.
In the meantime, Margie & Luke did the swim and while Margie complained that it was hard to breathe in the swimsuit, they finished the race with a time to beat of 8:05. Talking in the cab about the troubles Keisha & Jen were having, Margie said "Jen and Kisha, bye bye. They’re tough on land, but in the water, they’re nothing."
Tammy & Victor finally decide to stop attempting to dive after failing miserably on numerous tries and switch to swimming. After two dives, Jen started falling apart, crying that she didn’t want to do the task any more. Keisha tried her best to convince Jen to keep moving, saying "we want to go out strong," and pretty much resigning herself to the fact that it was the end of the line for them. After their swim was over with a time of 10:29 and Tammy & Victor found a cab, Victor started having horrible cramps in his legs and they had to take some time for the cramps to stop so Victor could bend his legs and sit in the cab. By this time Keisha had convinced Jen to go back for the swim, and they Keisha put on a flotation jacket to show solidarity with Jen, and they managed to get through the 200 meters each. (Okay, if one can’t swim this makes sense, and they had to know it would be available - I just can’t fathom someone being that petrified in a pool [as opposed to a lake or river] and wearing a life vest! A definite advantage over the other teams not using the life vests.)
With Victor having cramp trouble, I figured this gave the producers a chance to show a little mystery - maybe Keisha & Jen had time to catch up (their swimming time was 18:19). Would there be an actual race to the Mat for 3rd place?
Well, no. As Cara & Jamie proudly jump on the Mat in front of Phil, pretty sure they finally finished a leg in first, Phil pulls out a clue and tells them "this leg of the Race is not yet over. Keep racing!" I almost felt sorry for them - almost. Maybe if they’d been a bit nicer to people along the way.....
So we find out next week who our final three teams are! Got a favorite? Who do you want out next week? Let's talk!
Our teams are told to fly to Beijing, China and find a foot massage spa. Tammy & Victor were excited since they were just to Beijing for the Olympics and had a familiarity with the city. After the Mat argument last week, Luke is saying "It’s done with Keisha & Jen. We’re going to finish in the final three and kick their ass." Margie & Luke get to the airport first and as Keisha & Jen wait behind them to book tickets, they all find out that particular counter doesn’t accept foreign credit cards. Margie gets upset and mumbles that Keisha & Jen get to the other counter first rather than "go in the order that they were there in the first place." It doesn’t matter in the end, as they are all on the same flight. Tammy & Victor, using their language skills, ask the seating agent to give them seats as far up front as possible and put the other teams as far back as possible (leaving the Redheads in the last row). Tammy mentioned that "we will bring shame to our family" if they didn’t make it through this leg of the Race.
Once in Beijing, Luke and Keisha bumped into each other as they were running for taxis, but luckily nothing came out of that - I’m sure neither wanted to end up arrested in China for fighting at the airport. Keisha & Jen ended up with a slow cab driver and Cara & Jamie passed them up, even though they were the last off the plane after being stuck way in the back. Tammy remarked that she didn’t like feet, and was hoping that the task at the foot massage spa didn’t involve having to give foot rubs. Cara & Jamie make it to the spa first and find a Road Block. "One team member had to first drink a Chinese medicinal tea. Then, they would sit back and "enjoy" a foot massage, known for its therapeutic powers, which walked the fine line between pleasure and pain and lasted ten minutes. If the racer could endure the therapeutic massage for the entire ten minutes, they had to drink another cup of tea to receive their next clue. However, if the pain was too intense, the racer could say, "Uncle", to stop the massage, but if they did, they had to restart the massage from the beginning." Cara wasn’t thrilled with anyone touching her feet but I’m sure she would have welcomed a regular foot massage over what was to come. She was reduced to tears, squirming all over the chair as Jamie threatened her not to say "uncle." Keisha had to bite on her jacket to get through the "massage." As Tammy went in and saw the two of them, she asked "is it really that bad?" and Cara told her "having a baby has to be easier than this!" After a few minutes Tammy admitted that she’d much rather mess with someone else’s feet than endure the pain. Luke overruled Margie, who offered to do the task, and was sorry, signing "ow" over and over again. He and Tammy ended up holding hands for courage, and after Tammy left, he bit on his cap to get through the rest. (I don't even want to know what the "happy ending" at this spa was!!! Plus, the shots of the local spa ladies grinning creeped me out.)
The teams had trouble finding a taxi to take them to the Guangcai Natatorium which allowed Margie & Luke to catch up. Keisha & Jen were first to leave, and Cara & Jamie were going for the same cab as Tammy & Victor, who were telling the cab driver where they needed to go. Jamie bulldozed her way to the cab, telling Tammy "not this time, sister," and Tammy decided to let it go because "Jamie scares me." (All Tammy would have to do is scream in Chinese that Jamie had a gun or drugs and she’d be a bit delayed, I’d think! Of course, I can only imagine the penalty Phil would give her for that....)
At the Natatorium, Tammy & Victor get there first and get the clue, which is a Detour - Sync or Swim. "In Sync, teams would try to master the skill of synchronized diving by jumping off the three-meter springboard and hitting the water in perfect unison. When they performed a jump where they hit the water simultaneously, and received a passing score of five from the judges, they would receive their next clue. In Swim, teams had to change into the revolutionary Speedo laser suit, the same type of suit worn by Michael Phelps when he won 8 gold medals at the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games. Then, they had to swim eight lengths of the pool in a 400-meter relay with team members alternating every two lengths, and competing against Michael Phelps’ time of 04:03.84 in the individual medley. While teams did not have to beat Phelps’ time, each team member had to complete 200 meters of the relay to receive their next clue."
Tammy & Victor decide to try the diving after watching a diver bounce twice on the board and jump in feet first, thinking it would be easier than the swimming. Victor looked embarrassed walking out of the locker room with the bathing suit they gave him, a little Speedo, saying "this is skimpy." It was funny watching them try to "dive" in unison - they were getting scores of 1's and 2's - they couldn’t even jump off the boards at the same time! Keisha & Jen had gotten there by this time and decided to try the diving because Jen had a huge fear of water and figured this would be easier to take than swimming. Jen walked out to the edge of the board and said "I can’t do this" so they decided to switch tasks. As they changed into the laser swimsuits, Keisha mentioned that "I don’t think these are made for someone with these thighs," trying hard to squeeze into the suit. She jumped in first to swim the first leg, and while I thought she was taking so long and grabbing onto the lane markers on the way back, I realized she was doing that after about 10 meters (which isn’t like a skip in the park, but c’mon already!) I was a swimmer in high school, but we swam yards - when I got to college I visited the pool and jumped in to do a few laps, and realized it was a meter pool - and meters are much longer than I expected! Still, the teams were not expected to go fast or look pretty doing it, or not even stick to one stroke (they could dog paddle if they wanted). After her first lap, Jen convinced Keisha to go back to the diving board for another crack at that.
Cara & Jamie had decided to do the swim, and while they weren’t anywhere near graceful in the water, they kept at it and finished the 400 meters in 9:53. They got their clue and were told to head to the Pit Stop at Drum Tower. They were excited, thinking that this was finally the leg they could come in first, but knowing that they’ve been first to leave tasks before and something always managed to screw them up like bad drivers or directions kept them anxious.
In the meantime, Margie & Luke did the swim and while Margie complained that it was hard to breathe in the swimsuit, they finished the race with a time to beat of 8:05. Talking in the cab about the troubles Keisha & Jen were having, Margie said "Jen and Kisha, bye bye. They’re tough on land, but in the water, they’re nothing."
Tammy & Victor finally decide to stop attempting to dive after failing miserably on numerous tries and switch to swimming. After two dives, Jen started falling apart, crying that she didn’t want to do the task any more. Keisha tried her best to convince Jen to keep moving, saying "we want to go out strong," and pretty much resigning herself to the fact that it was the end of the line for them. After their swim was over with a time of 10:29 and Tammy & Victor found a cab, Victor started having horrible cramps in his legs and they had to take some time for the cramps to stop so Victor could bend his legs and sit in the cab. By this time Keisha had convinced Jen to go back for the swim, and they Keisha put on a flotation jacket to show solidarity with Jen, and they managed to get through the 200 meters each. (Okay, if one can’t swim this makes sense, and they had to know it would be available - I just can’t fathom someone being that petrified in a pool [as opposed to a lake or river] and wearing a life vest! A definite advantage over the other teams not using the life vests.)
With Victor having cramp trouble, I figured this gave the producers a chance to show a little mystery - maybe Keisha & Jen had time to catch up (their swimming time was 18:19). Would there be an actual race to the Mat for 3rd place?
Well, no. As Cara & Jamie proudly jump on the Mat in front of Phil, pretty sure they finally finished a leg in first, Phil pulls out a clue and tells them "this leg of the Race is not yet over. Keep racing!" I almost felt sorry for them - almost. Maybe if they’d been a bit nicer to people along the way.....
So we find out next week who our final three teams are! Got a favorite? Who do you want out next week? Let's talk!
Monday, April 20, 2009
No Melting Mat, But Plenty of Bickering While the Stunt Guys Go Home
Well, after the much-hyped "mat meltdown" previews, it didn’t live up to the billing for me, although what led up to the arguments at the Mat seemed pretty childish and really rough for the Race! Luke and Jen got pretty physical going after the clue boxes, and it ended up with really bad feelings for both teams. Will they manage to settle down and behave like competitive adults or keep up the schoolyard fighting? We’ll see ....
The teams begin from Bangkok, Thailand and are told to fly to Guilin, China and then taxi to Qing Xui Lu to a hair salon and look for the clue box. Margie & Luke, leaving the Pit Stop first, find a flight leaving at 11:20 a.m. and no other teams can catch that flight. Tammy & Victor were excited about going to China - Tammy can speak fluent Chinese and they’re finally going to be able to communicate. It seemed like an omen when Jen said "With only five teams left, it’s getting tight and if someone’s in front of me I’m gonna knock ‘em over."
Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie caught up to Margie & Luke at the Guangzhou airport for their connecting flight, which was delayed. Kisha & Jen were on another flight leaving at 9:10 and ended up being first out of that airport. They were a bit worried, though, saying "We haven’t seen another team all day, we don’t know what the hell is going on." While Tammy & Victor easily tell their driver where they want to go, Luke says he’d like to go to a country where everyone is deaf, so they could have the advantage.
Kisha & Jen ended up with a cabbie who couldn’t find the hair salon and let them off in the wrong spot, killing what lead they had. Tammy & Victor see them and hope to pass them up, but their cabbie can’t find the salon either. Tammy laughs that "Even if we can speak the language, it just means we can understand that he doesn’t know where he’s going." Cara & Jamie have a great driver and are first to clue box, which tells them to go to the #24 Bridge. Tammy & Victor find the salon right after and are hot on the trail of the Redheads. Kisha & Jen jumped in another cab and said" We don’t trust Margie & Luke, they gave us wrong directions before." Margie & Luke get to the salon just before Kisha & Jen, and together they roam around like blind rats, with neither team seeing the clue box (and Luke could have stepped on it, he was so close). As they meander around, they manage to spot it from a couple doors down at the same time and took off running - and here comes the schoolyard behavior. Luke got there a hair before Jen, who pushed him a little (I think from the momentum of running, it didn’t look purposeful at all). Luke tries to keep Jen from getting her clue and Luke brought up his elbow and got really close to biffing Jen in the head. (Like getting the clue an extra second or two before Jen would really give them an advantage!) Jen calls him a bitch (and while I like Margie & Luke, I’m blaming Luke for this one, he maybe wasn’t a bitch, but he was acting like a real butthead). After his Mom tells him that the girls called him a bitch, Luke said "calling the deaf guy a bitch is not nice." (You know, Luke, you can’t have it both ways. Either you’re just like everyone else except you can’t hear, or you deserve special treatment. If the deaf guy acts like a bitch, he can be called a bitch!) Each team is yapping up a storm in their cabs, blaming the other team. Yeah, whatever. Get over yourselves, play nice kids!
At the bridge, Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie get their clues and find a Roadblock.
"In it, one team member had to take a raft out to the middle of the Li River and, with the help of a local, train birds known as cormorants to retrieve fish. Once they got their cormorant to return with a fish ten times, they would receive their next clue." Tammy and Jamie elect to try the task and as they take a boat out to the rafts, round two begins for Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke, as they get to the clue box at the same time at the bridge. Jen is in front this time and Luke bumps into her at clue box and knocks her into it. (There. Now you’re even, each one of you got the clue first. Now settle down & race nice!) The complaining continues, as Kisha & Jen tell Victor as they pass his boat that "Luke pushed me into the clue box." (Wah, wah wah).
Mark & Michael left a good 4 hours behind all the other teams and are just getting to the salon, where they must perform the speed bump task. They have to wash and dry two little old ladies’ hair. Obviously they couldn’t go into the salon without being licensed in China, and the stunt guys get to perform their task out in front of the salon on the street. (Really, I think that was just the producer's way of giving back to the locals, by letting them laugh at the two little Americans "massaging the scalps" of two poor Chinese ladies). The ladies sit in chairs with a little towel on their shoulders and the guys just dump shampoo on their dry hair and start scrubbing. Mark said "It’s like I’m giving my Mom a shampoo," and if that’s how they do it at their house, it’s definitely wierd!
Back in the water, Tammy’s birds are not cooperating in finding fish. Victor tells her to stop speaking English and speak Chinese to the birds. Jamie is pretty grossed out with the fish but was surprised that "they could teach the birds to get them and not eat the fish. If somebody put filet mignon in my mouth, I’d eat it." (Hear, hear, sister!) Jamie’s birds were fighting over the fish. Luke doesn’t see his bird coming and puts his hand out holding a fish and the bird bites him on the hand. Luke says "dumb bird" (yes, that’s right Luke - the deaf guy isn’t dumb for holding out a fish that birds are trained to go after). Tammy’s birds don’t seem into their work and keep flying away. Jen gets done first with Jamie a close second.
The clue instructs the teams to go to the Ancient South Gate. Jen mentions on the way that "I really believe in karma" with Luke getting bit by the bird. Thanks to her birds, Tammy lost the lead and they finished last at the task, but since Margie & Luke had the slowest boat pusher (no engines, they used long poles to push off from the bottom of the river) they left the task in third place. As Victor jumps into his waiting cab, he tries to get an advantage and tells Margie & Luke’s cabbie in Chinese to "slow down - you’re driving too fast."
Mark & Michael get done with their Speed Bump and take off from the salon, hoping to catch another team at the #24 Bridge. No such luck, and here’s where we realize that unless something really drastic happens to another team (like Luke throwing Jen off a bridge) they’re pretty much toast. And after hearing Mark say "fowl is fish" (referring to the clue at the Roadblock saying "Who’s ready for some fowl play?") I’m figuring that gives us the clue as to why they kept getting themselves in trouble with the rules - a little ditzy, guys.
At the Ancient South Gate, the clue is a Detour: Choreography or Calligraphy. "In Choreography, teams had to make their way to the central island, and join a group of locals performing their morning dance routine, a popular form of exercise in Guilin. After learning the dance, the team had to perform it for a pair of judges who would hand them their next clue after they executed the steps correctly. In Calligraphy, teams had to make their way across the twin bridges and find the first of four calligraphy stations. Once there, they had to copy a series of Chinese characters that form the name of their next artist’s station. When they successfully reached the fourth and final station, the artist would hand them their next clue." Cara & Jamie race off to choreography, with Jamie saying "I have the most atrocious handwriting - in college I couldn’t even read my own notes."
As Cara & Jamie learned the dance, they joked that their teachers were "manhandling us" as the couple pushed them into position. Still thinking this would be a piece of cake, they stated "We’re cheerleaders. We pick up choreography at a quicker pace, this is our advantage." So much for an advantage, they were stepping on other dancers and crashing into couples as they did the routine. Their teachers were having a great time on the sidelines laughing at them. After two attempts they are told they still don’t have it right, and Jamie is getting frustrated with the judge, who doesn’t speak English (imagine!) and can’t tell her what they’re doing wrong. (I keep wondering how long it will take to sink in to Jamie’s head that other countries speak different languages and it is not unusual for them not to speak English!) They stomp off to switch tasks, but decide to give it another shot by dancing until the music stops, not when they’ve been through the routine once. This was what they were doing wrong and they finally get their clue.
At the calligraphy station, Tammy & Victor are chattering in Chinese as the teams try to copy what he is drawing. They get done and tell the calligrapher to stamp them first, which the calligrapher goes along with - after all, he can understand them! Tammy & Victor try to garner sympathy from the artist, telling him that "if we don’t win our parents will cry themselves to death." The drawing wasn’t really that difficult, but finding the next station was the problem, and since Tammy & Victor easily found out where to go, Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke stayed right on their tails and followed them through the challenge.
Mark is in the boat covered up with a blanket and looking quite comfortable while Michael throws fish to his bird. I know it’s fun watching the birds retrieve the fish, but Michael was tossing the fish really far from the boat and wasting a lot of precious time. Maybe he knew they were done for and figured he’d have fun while he could.
Tammy & Victor finish the calligraphy task first and get their clue to go to the Pit Stop on foot. Margie & Luke and Kisha & Jen are close behind. Phil sees them all running and mentions it to the Chinese couple eating noodles and sipping tea at a table next to Phil, and they are more impressed with their lunch than the fact that a bunch of crazy Americans are barreling toward them. Kisha & Jen make it to the Mat first (running is their specialty, after all), with Tammy & Victor second and Margie & Luke third.
Phil looks at the teams and mentions that "things are getting a little more tense now, as we get closer to the finish." Victor smiles and agrees, but says "it’s a good spirited competition." This whole time, Margie is signing to Luke not to say anything, and Luke arguing that "I’m angry," After Victor’s remark, though, Margie blurts out that Jen "bashed into Luke" shoving him from behind - twice! - and then called him a bitch. Kisha & Jen babbled back to Phil, giving their side of the story about what happened. (Victor and Tammy are beginning to look worried, standing between the two teams on the Mat. Victor is probably thinking that he should keep his thoughts to himself from now on!) Luke gets pissed and walks away but Phil calls him back to "get your side of the story." He signs that "it’s my turn to talk now" and Kisha gives what is described as a "nervous giggle." This sets Margie off again, and she yells "don’t laugh at my son when he signs." Kisha says no, she smiles during tense situations, but Margie gets more pissed. "He’s signing and they’re laughing at him." Phil tries to calm her down and says "I don’t think that’s what they meant" but Margie’s on a roll and starts lecturing. "He’s lived with this his whole life and he doesn’t need it from people like you. You should understand oppression because you’re black and you’ve lived with it." Nice comment, empathetic, but lost on the sisters. You can’t make good points while screaming at someone (should have learned that from Jamie through the whole Race!) Of course, all this while they’re showing replays of the clue box battles, slow motion and all. Every time I saw the clips it fortified my feeling that all that drama and yelling was just overblown and ridiculous.
Cara & Jamie finally get their clue after the dance and made it to the Mat in fourth place. Cara asked Phil "were there five on this leg?" and felt very relieved when Phil confirmed it. Mark & Michael are shown doing the dance and looking hilarious with the teachers giggling even more than when watching the Redheads. Of course, they couldn’t make up the penalty time and ended up eliminated. They were nice enough guys, but their dumb mistakes and lack of knowledge of the rules eventually killed their chances. (And I really don’t mind - Michael’s nipples were starting to bother me. They’re really pointy and it was just ... weird.)
It’s getting interesting and close to the finish. Who’s got the best shot? Will Cara & Jamie actually be able to make it through the next leg so they can race in their own country (but don’t send Jamie down south, she’ll probably yell at people’s accents down there too!) Can Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke play nice, or will they start a war in another country? Will Tammy & Victor keep up their good relationship and cruise in to win? The end is near!
1 - Kisha & Jen
2 - Tammy & Victor
3 - Margie & Luke
4 - Cara & Jaime
5 - Mark & Michael - Eliminated
The teams begin from Bangkok, Thailand and are told to fly to Guilin, China and then taxi to Qing Xui Lu to a hair salon and look for the clue box. Margie & Luke, leaving the Pit Stop first, find a flight leaving at 11:20 a.m. and no other teams can catch that flight. Tammy & Victor were excited about going to China - Tammy can speak fluent Chinese and they’re finally going to be able to communicate. It seemed like an omen when Jen said "With only five teams left, it’s getting tight and if someone’s in front of me I’m gonna knock ‘em over."
Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie caught up to Margie & Luke at the Guangzhou airport for their connecting flight, which was delayed. Kisha & Jen were on another flight leaving at 9:10 and ended up being first out of that airport. They were a bit worried, though, saying "We haven’t seen another team all day, we don’t know what the hell is going on." While Tammy & Victor easily tell their driver where they want to go, Luke says he’d like to go to a country where everyone is deaf, so they could have the advantage.
Kisha & Jen ended up with a cabbie who couldn’t find the hair salon and let them off in the wrong spot, killing what lead they had. Tammy & Victor see them and hope to pass them up, but their cabbie can’t find the salon either. Tammy laughs that "Even if we can speak the language, it just means we can understand that he doesn’t know where he’s going." Cara & Jamie have a great driver and are first to clue box, which tells them to go to the #24 Bridge. Tammy & Victor find the salon right after and are hot on the trail of the Redheads. Kisha & Jen jumped in another cab and said" We don’t trust Margie & Luke, they gave us wrong directions before." Margie & Luke get to the salon just before Kisha & Jen, and together they roam around like blind rats, with neither team seeing the clue box (and Luke could have stepped on it, he was so close). As they meander around, they manage to spot it from a couple doors down at the same time and took off running - and here comes the schoolyard behavior. Luke got there a hair before Jen, who pushed him a little (I think from the momentum of running, it didn’t look purposeful at all). Luke tries to keep Jen from getting her clue and Luke brought up his elbow and got really close to biffing Jen in the head. (Like getting the clue an extra second or two before Jen would really give them an advantage!) Jen calls him a bitch (and while I like Margie & Luke, I’m blaming Luke for this one, he maybe wasn’t a bitch, but he was acting like a real butthead). After his Mom tells him that the girls called him a bitch, Luke said "calling the deaf guy a bitch is not nice." (You know, Luke, you can’t have it both ways. Either you’re just like everyone else except you can’t hear, or you deserve special treatment. If the deaf guy acts like a bitch, he can be called a bitch!) Each team is yapping up a storm in their cabs, blaming the other team. Yeah, whatever. Get over yourselves, play nice kids!
At the bridge, Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie get their clues and find a Roadblock.
"In it, one team member had to take a raft out to the middle of the Li River and, with the help of a local, train birds known as cormorants to retrieve fish. Once they got their cormorant to return with a fish ten times, they would receive their next clue." Tammy and Jamie elect to try the task and as they take a boat out to the rafts, round two begins for Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke, as they get to the clue box at the same time at the bridge. Jen is in front this time and Luke bumps into her at clue box and knocks her into it. (There. Now you’re even, each one of you got the clue first. Now settle down & race nice!) The complaining continues, as Kisha & Jen tell Victor as they pass his boat that "Luke pushed me into the clue box." (Wah, wah wah).
Mark & Michael left a good 4 hours behind all the other teams and are just getting to the salon, where they must perform the speed bump task. They have to wash and dry two little old ladies’ hair. Obviously they couldn’t go into the salon without being licensed in China, and the stunt guys get to perform their task out in front of the salon on the street. (Really, I think that was just the producer's way of giving back to the locals, by letting them laugh at the two little Americans "massaging the scalps" of two poor Chinese ladies). The ladies sit in chairs with a little towel on their shoulders and the guys just dump shampoo on their dry hair and start scrubbing. Mark said "It’s like I’m giving my Mom a shampoo," and if that’s how they do it at their house, it’s definitely wierd!
Back in the water, Tammy’s birds are not cooperating in finding fish. Victor tells her to stop speaking English and speak Chinese to the birds. Jamie is pretty grossed out with the fish but was surprised that "they could teach the birds to get them and not eat the fish. If somebody put filet mignon in my mouth, I’d eat it." (Hear, hear, sister!) Jamie’s birds were fighting over the fish. Luke doesn’t see his bird coming and puts his hand out holding a fish and the bird bites him on the hand. Luke says "dumb bird" (yes, that’s right Luke - the deaf guy isn’t dumb for holding out a fish that birds are trained to go after). Tammy’s birds don’t seem into their work and keep flying away. Jen gets done first with Jamie a close second.
The clue instructs the teams to go to the Ancient South Gate. Jen mentions on the way that "I really believe in karma" with Luke getting bit by the bird. Thanks to her birds, Tammy lost the lead and they finished last at the task, but since Margie & Luke had the slowest boat pusher (no engines, they used long poles to push off from the bottom of the river) they left the task in third place. As Victor jumps into his waiting cab, he tries to get an advantage and tells Margie & Luke’s cabbie in Chinese to "slow down - you’re driving too fast."
Mark & Michael get done with their Speed Bump and take off from the salon, hoping to catch another team at the #24 Bridge. No such luck, and here’s where we realize that unless something really drastic happens to another team (like Luke throwing Jen off a bridge) they’re pretty much toast. And after hearing Mark say "fowl is fish" (referring to the clue at the Roadblock saying "Who’s ready for some fowl play?") I’m figuring that gives us the clue as to why they kept getting themselves in trouble with the rules - a little ditzy, guys.
At the Ancient South Gate, the clue is a Detour: Choreography or Calligraphy. "In Choreography, teams had to make their way to the central island, and join a group of locals performing their morning dance routine, a popular form of exercise in Guilin. After learning the dance, the team had to perform it for a pair of judges who would hand them their next clue after they executed the steps correctly. In Calligraphy, teams had to make their way across the twin bridges and find the first of four calligraphy stations. Once there, they had to copy a series of Chinese characters that form the name of their next artist’s station. When they successfully reached the fourth and final station, the artist would hand them their next clue." Cara & Jamie race off to choreography, with Jamie saying "I have the most atrocious handwriting - in college I couldn’t even read my own notes."
As Cara & Jamie learned the dance, they joked that their teachers were "manhandling us" as the couple pushed them into position. Still thinking this would be a piece of cake, they stated "We’re cheerleaders. We pick up choreography at a quicker pace, this is our advantage." So much for an advantage, they were stepping on other dancers and crashing into couples as they did the routine. Their teachers were having a great time on the sidelines laughing at them. After two attempts they are told they still don’t have it right, and Jamie is getting frustrated with the judge, who doesn’t speak English (imagine!) and can’t tell her what they’re doing wrong. (I keep wondering how long it will take to sink in to Jamie’s head that other countries speak different languages and it is not unusual for them not to speak English!) They stomp off to switch tasks, but decide to give it another shot by dancing until the music stops, not when they’ve been through the routine once. This was what they were doing wrong and they finally get their clue.
At the calligraphy station, Tammy & Victor are chattering in Chinese as the teams try to copy what he is drawing. They get done and tell the calligrapher to stamp them first, which the calligrapher goes along with - after all, he can understand them! Tammy & Victor try to garner sympathy from the artist, telling him that "if we don’t win our parents will cry themselves to death." The drawing wasn’t really that difficult, but finding the next station was the problem, and since Tammy & Victor easily found out where to go, Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke stayed right on their tails and followed them through the challenge.
Mark is in the boat covered up with a blanket and looking quite comfortable while Michael throws fish to his bird. I know it’s fun watching the birds retrieve the fish, but Michael was tossing the fish really far from the boat and wasting a lot of precious time. Maybe he knew they were done for and figured he’d have fun while he could.
Tammy & Victor finish the calligraphy task first and get their clue to go to the Pit Stop on foot. Margie & Luke and Kisha & Jen are close behind. Phil sees them all running and mentions it to the Chinese couple eating noodles and sipping tea at a table next to Phil, and they are more impressed with their lunch than the fact that a bunch of crazy Americans are barreling toward them. Kisha & Jen make it to the Mat first (running is their specialty, after all), with Tammy & Victor second and Margie & Luke third.
Phil looks at the teams and mentions that "things are getting a little more tense now, as we get closer to the finish." Victor smiles and agrees, but says "it’s a good spirited competition." This whole time, Margie is signing to Luke not to say anything, and Luke arguing that "I’m angry," After Victor’s remark, though, Margie blurts out that Jen "bashed into Luke" shoving him from behind - twice! - and then called him a bitch. Kisha & Jen babbled back to Phil, giving their side of the story about what happened. (Victor and Tammy are beginning to look worried, standing between the two teams on the Mat. Victor is probably thinking that he should keep his thoughts to himself from now on!) Luke gets pissed and walks away but Phil calls him back to "get your side of the story." He signs that "it’s my turn to talk now" and Kisha gives what is described as a "nervous giggle." This sets Margie off again, and she yells "don’t laugh at my son when he signs." Kisha says no, she smiles during tense situations, but Margie gets more pissed. "He’s signing and they’re laughing at him." Phil tries to calm her down and says "I don’t think that’s what they meant" but Margie’s on a roll and starts lecturing. "He’s lived with this his whole life and he doesn’t need it from people like you. You should understand oppression because you’re black and you’ve lived with it." Nice comment, empathetic, but lost on the sisters. You can’t make good points while screaming at someone (should have learned that from Jamie through the whole Race!) Of course, all this while they’re showing replays of the clue box battles, slow motion and all. Every time I saw the clips it fortified my feeling that all that drama and yelling was just overblown and ridiculous.
Cara & Jamie finally get their clue after the dance and made it to the Mat in fourth place. Cara asked Phil "were there five on this leg?" and felt very relieved when Phil confirmed it. Mark & Michael are shown doing the dance and looking hilarious with the teachers giggling even more than when watching the Redheads. Of course, they couldn’t make up the penalty time and ended up eliminated. They were nice enough guys, but their dumb mistakes and lack of knowledge of the rules eventually killed their chances. (And I really don’t mind - Michael’s nipples were starting to bother me. They’re really pointy and it was just ... weird.)
It’s getting interesting and close to the finish. Who’s got the best shot? Will Cara & Jamie actually be able to make it through the next leg so they can race in their own country (but don’t send Jamie down south, she’ll probably yell at people’s accents down there too!) Can Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke play nice, or will they start a war in another country? Will Tammy & Victor keep up their good relationship and cruise in to win? The end is near!
1 - Kisha & Jen
2 - Tammy & Victor
3 - Margie & Luke
4 - Cara & Jaime
5 - Mark & Michael - Eliminated
Monday, April 13, 2009
You Need Your Passport. Really! And About Those Transvestites.....
After a week’s hiatus for the Country Music Awards, the Amazing Race continues! Our teams this week seemed to have lost it a bit - two teams leave their backpacks at a boatyard, Jamie is still being obnoxious to non-English speaking people, and we learn of a new rule that I swear was never a rule before. Let’s get going....
Tammy & Victor, leaving first, are instructed to fly to Bangkok, Thailand. Once there, they have to taxi to a boatyard to find their next clue. Cara & Jamie, leaving second, decide they want an "official" taxi and ask another gentleman on the street if it was "official." When the gentleman goes to ask someone else, Jamie screams "Listen! Don’t talk to him!" She explains it by saying "the language barrier frustrates me and I just can’t do anything about it." Huh? She has no self-control? Or is she just an innate bitch?
All the teams end up on the same flight to Bangkok. They tell their taxi drivers to "go fast" and urge them to pass the cab ahead of them, but none of the cabbies know where they’re going. Margie & Luke are following Kisha & Jen’s taxi and when the drivers stopped to get directions, Margie instructed her driver to tell Kisha & Jen’s driver the wrong directions. While not nasty, Margie & Luke are definitely playing to win this Race. And just to look at them, you wouldn’t have figured them to get this far - a deaf guy and his mommy?
At the boatyard, the clue was a Roadblock. One team member was to attach a propeller to a boat to get their next clue. Cara & Jamie had caught up to Margie & Luke but Margie made very short work of the propeller-building and was done first. The clue told them to navigate the canals with a map to find their next clue. Luke told Margie to get their bags before they took off from the dock. I didn’t think much of that (seemed like a no-brainer to me) until the other teams caught up, told their cabs to wait, and concentrated on the propeller. Cara & Jamie ran back to the cab to get their backpacks, trying not to let the other teams know what their clue was. Mark & Michael get done and take off, leaving their belongings with their waiting taxi. I’m beginning to see trouble looming! Mark & Michael wrongly assume they’ll be bringing the boat back to the dock (why they figured this, I don’t know. Really. How many times do they begin in one place and go back to that place? Really!) Kisha & Jen take off without their bags OR their fanny pack (with their money and passports in it) and leave Kisha’s shoes on the dock as well. Now backpacks, with clothing, etc. I can see one could live without if one had to. But to leave your money and passports out in a foreign country and "hope" it will still be there when you get back....just plain dumb. Victor proves to be a lousy mechanic as his propeller doesn’t work the first time and he has to try again. By this time the other teams have all gone - and Tammy & Victor wisely go get their bags before they take off in their boat. As they putter down the canal in their boat, Jen frets about their fanny pack with their passports, but Kisha tells her they’ll be coming back and not to worry about it. Jen mentions that she’s "listening to big sister" but finds out being older doesn’t necessarily make one smarter. There is some conversation about going back for the bags with Mark & Michael, but they press forward also.
The next clue is a Detour - Broken Teeth or Broken Record. The official website is not up yet for me to copy it formally, so you’ll be stuck with the "unofficial" version: In Broken Teeth, the teams had to go to a hallway called "the aisle of smiles" to find people waiting in front of bowls of water with assorted dentures. The teams had to pick through the dentures and match 5 people with their correct teeth. For Broken Record, the teams would find a karaoke cab and ride along for five miles, singing with a group of lovely (?) women (?). A couple of those women had extra appendages, I’d bet, if ya know what I mean! Margie & Luke are the only team to opt for the denture fitting - Margie says "I’m a bad singer, he’s a really bad singer, so we’re going to spare the people of Bangkok." At least they get gloves, masks and safety glasses to wear while helping the people with their teeth. It was pretty icky, but pretty funny, and Luke was pathetic at trying to fit the dentures - he was sticking lower dentures in people who needed uppers. Margie, saying it wasn’t difficult to get into people’s "personal space" because she was a nurse, fit all five people and off they went to the Pit Stop.
Jen is still fretting about her passport "sitting on a dock somewhere" but they jump in the karaoke cab and sing along, having a great time. Jen cracked me up, though, talking about their ride: ''My first question was, are those transvestites? My next question was, why do they wear so much makeup? Third question was, why are we in a party taxi with three transvestites?'' In the meantime, Tammy & Victor catch up and decide "we’re Chinese, we have to do karaoke." Mark & Michael, after much arguing and debate, decide to go back to their cab at the boatyard for their backpacks before they attempt the Detour. Mark is berating Michael for wanting to go back for his backpack, saying a million dollars was much more worth it, while Michael kept mentioning "irreplaceable stuff" he didn’t want to leave behind. My thought here is the cost of the cab, sitting there with the meter running....and running....and the fare getting higher.
Kisha & Jen get done with their ride and have to find a cab driver to take them to the Pit Stop - but they have no money, so they have to hope they can sucker a taxi into taking them for free. Cara & Jamie are running around yelling at cabbies to find one who knows where the Pit Stop is - a palace (which to me would be something a cabbie should know about, no?) Tammy & Victor mention that they’re happy to see Cara & Jamie, considering the redheads were out of the boatyard way ahead, but they’ve caught up. Mark & Michael get back to their original cab, pay the man and get their stuff, noticing that there was another cab waiting. Feeling a little better that at least one other team would have to go back, they took off for the Detour to attempt the karaoke.
Tammy & Victor’s cab has to stop for directions to the Pit Stop, and Cara & Jamie’s cabbie (who was following Tammy & Victor) has to ask as well. Jamie continued screeching at her cab driver, telling him not to tell Tammy & Victor’s driver the directions. As Mark & Michael get back to the Detour, they were $185 short (Thai money, don’t know what it’s called) and bartered a flashlight and compass to make up for it. They figured they’d also have to negotiate the cab fare to the Pit Stop. They jump in the karaoke cab with their transvestites, although it seemed that they didn’t know the girls weren’t girls, saying that "we’re part of the entertainment business, so we know how to show these girls a good time." Oh, yeah. They’d show you a thing or two, guys! And not a thing you’d want to see!!!
Margie & Luke have already checked in first to the Pit Stop. Cara & Jamie get there second, and Kisha & Jen outrun Tammy & Victor to get to the Mat third. However, Phil tells them they cannot check in without their travel documents, because without their passports, they couldn’t leave Thailand and they’d have to go back for their documents before they could be checked in. (It would be helpful for Kisha to have her shoes as well). That gave Tammy & Victor third place.
I remember Dallas & Toni, the mom & son from last season, checking in at the Mat without their passports (after their belongings drove off in a cab in Russia). Phil didn’t tell them they couldn’t check in, but then, after some research I found out they were last anyway and therefore eliminated.
Mark & Michael get finished singing and hop in a cab to the Pit Stop, and have to bargain with that driver for their lack of cash. He accepts a carabiner (which I find out is part of rock-climbing equipment. I would think that the show supplies that sort of thing when necessary ... why would they carry one of those? Unless they spend their time at the Pit Stops keeping their stuntmen skills sharp by scaling the overnight locations). They make it to the Mat before Kisha & Jen but are told by a very scowling Phil that they’ve really done it this time! and incurred TWO 2-hour penalties. "You broke a Race rule and used a personal possession to pay cab fare. Twice." Shame, shame!
I have to break in here though - I could swear that on other Races I’ve seen contestants offer shoes, jackets, and the like to get their cabbie paid off. I remember! It was our loveable nerds, Andrew & Dan, who kept running out of money and offering anything they could to their cabbie so they could go on their way. I guess the producers added the rule for this season (or they don’t like Mark & Michael, who are either being persecuted unfairly so they lose, or really need to sit down and read the rule book!)
As Mark & Michael sit and stew for their 4-hour penalty, Kisha & Jen show up and know they’re last to check in. Phil lets them know they managed fourth place, and they were so relieved they broke down in tears. Mark & Michael are allowed to crawl up to the Mat where Phil tells them it is a non-elimination leg, but in addition to the required Speed Bump on the next leg of the Race, the leftover 3-plus hours of their penalty will be added to their start time. Michael tried to explain everything by saying they used personal belongings rather than stiff their cabbie because "we are in the land of Buddha and didn’t want to create any bad karma." Phil showed no sympathy - in fact, I think that’s the grouchiest he ever looked! I’m wondering what Phil has against these little guys! His blog isn’t up yet, but I will be looking for it!
The order of finish:
1 - Margie & Luke
2 - Cara & Jamie
3 - Victor & Tammy
4 - Kisha & Jen
5 - Mark & Michael (non-eliminated with mucho penalties)
So are the "new" rules a surprise to you too? Are you feeling sorry for the little guys or figuring they deserve it? Can Margie & Luke actually win this thing, being nice while screwing other teams as much as possible? Stay tuned, folks!
Tammy & Victor, leaving first, are instructed to fly to Bangkok, Thailand. Once there, they have to taxi to a boatyard to find their next clue. Cara & Jamie, leaving second, decide they want an "official" taxi and ask another gentleman on the street if it was "official." When the gentleman goes to ask someone else, Jamie screams "Listen! Don’t talk to him!" She explains it by saying "the language barrier frustrates me and I just can’t do anything about it." Huh? She has no self-control? Or is she just an innate bitch?
All the teams end up on the same flight to Bangkok. They tell their taxi drivers to "go fast" and urge them to pass the cab ahead of them, but none of the cabbies know where they’re going. Margie & Luke are following Kisha & Jen’s taxi and when the drivers stopped to get directions, Margie instructed her driver to tell Kisha & Jen’s driver the wrong directions. While not nasty, Margie & Luke are definitely playing to win this Race. And just to look at them, you wouldn’t have figured them to get this far - a deaf guy and his mommy?
At the boatyard, the clue was a Roadblock. One team member was to attach a propeller to a boat to get their next clue. Cara & Jamie had caught up to Margie & Luke but Margie made very short work of the propeller-building and was done first. The clue told them to navigate the canals with a map to find their next clue. Luke told Margie to get their bags before they took off from the dock. I didn’t think much of that (seemed like a no-brainer to me) until the other teams caught up, told their cabs to wait, and concentrated on the propeller. Cara & Jamie ran back to the cab to get their backpacks, trying not to let the other teams know what their clue was. Mark & Michael get done and take off, leaving their belongings with their waiting taxi. I’m beginning to see trouble looming! Mark & Michael wrongly assume they’ll be bringing the boat back to the dock (why they figured this, I don’t know. Really. How many times do they begin in one place and go back to that place? Really!) Kisha & Jen take off without their bags OR their fanny pack (with their money and passports in it) and leave Kisha’s shoes on the dock as well. Now backpacks, with clothing, etc. I can see one could live without if one had to. But to leave your money and passports out in a foreign country and "hope" it will still be there when you get back....just plain dumb. Victor proves to be a lousy mechanic as his propeller doesn’t work the first time and he has to try again. By this time the other teams have all gone - and Tammy & Victor wisely go get their bags before they take off in their boat. As they putter down the canal in their boat, Jen frets about their fanny pack with their passports, but Kisha tells her they’ll be coming back and not to worry about it. Jen mentions that she’s "listening to big sister" but finds out being older doesn’t necessarily make one smarter. There is some conversation about going back for the bags with Mark & Michael, but they press forward also.
The next clue is a Detour - Broken Teeth or Broken Record. The official website is not up yet for me to copy it formally, so you’ll be stuck with the "unofficial" version: In Broken Teeth, the teams had to go to a hallway called "the aisle of smiles" to find people waiting in front of bowls of water with assorted dentures. The teams had to pick through the dentures and match 5 people with their correct teeth. For Broken Record, the teams would find a karaoke cab and ride along for five miles, singing with a group of lovely (?) women (?). A couple of those women had extra appendages, I’d bet, if ya know what I mean! Margie & Luke are the only team to opt for the denture fitting - Margie says "I’m a bad singer, he’s a really bad singer, so we’re going to spare the people of Bangkok." At least they get gloves, masks and safety glasses to wear while helping the people with their teeth. It was pretty icky, but pretty funny, and Luke was pathetic at trying to fit the dentures - he was sticking lower dentures in people who needed uppers. Margie, saying it wasn’t difficult to get into people’s "personal space" because she was a nurse, fit all five people and off they went to the Pit Stop.
Jen is still fretting about her passport "sitting on a dock somewhere" but they jump in the karaoke cab and sing along, having a great time. Jen cracked me up, though, talking about their ride: ''My first question was, are those transvestites? My next question was, why do they wear so much makeup? Third question was, why are we in a party taxi with three transvestites?'' In the meantime, Tammy & Victor catch up and decide "we’re Chinese, we have to do karaoke." Mark & Michael, after much arguing and debate, decide to go back to their cab at the boatyard for their backpacks before they attempt the Detour. Mark is berating Michael for wanting to go back for his backpack, saying a million dollars was much more worth it, while Michael kept mentioning "irreplaceable stuff" he didn’t want to leave behind. My thought here is the cost of the cab, sitting there with the meter running....and running....and the fare getting higher.
Kisha & Jen get done with their ride and have to find a cab driver to take them to the Pit Stop - but they have no money, so they have to hope they can sucker a taxi into taking them for free. Cara & Jamie are running around yelling at cabbies to find one who knows where the Pit Stop is - a palace (which to me would be something a cabbie should know about, no?) Tammy & Victor mention that they’re happy to see Cara & Jamie, considering the redheads were out of the boatyard way ahead, but they’ve caught up. Mark & Michael get back to their original cab, pay the man and get their stuff, noticing that there was another cab waiting. Feeling a little better that at least one other team would have to go back, they took off for the Detour to attempt the karaoke.
Tammy & Victor’s cab has to stop for directions to the Pit Stop, and Cara & Jamie’s cabbie (who was following Tammy & Victor) has to ask as well. Jamie continued screeching at her cab driver, telling him not to tell Tammy & Victor’s driver the directions. As Mark & Michael get back to the Detour, they were $185 short (Thai money, don’t know what it’s called) and bartered a flashlight and compass to make up for it. They figured they’d also have to negotiate the cab fare to the Pit Stop. They jump in the karaoke cab with their transvestites, although it seemed that they didn’t know the girls weren’t girls, saying that "we’re part of the entertainment business, so we know how to show these girls a good time." Oh, yeah. They’d show you a thing or two, guys! And not a thing you’d want to see!!!
Margie & Luke have already checked in first to the Pit Stop. Cara & Jamie get there second, and Kisha & Jen outrun Tammy & Victor to get to the Mat third. However, Phil tells them they cannot check in without their travel documents, because without their passports, they couldn’t leave Thailand and they’d have to go back for their documents before they could be checked in. (It would be helpful for Kisha to have her shoes as well). That gave Tammy & Victor third place.
I remember Dallas & Toni, the mom & son from last season, checking in at the Mat without their passports (after their belongings drove off in a cab in Russia). Phil didn’t tell them they couldn’t check in, but then, after some research I found out they were last anyway and therefore eliminated.
Mark & Michael get finished singing and hop in a cab to the Pit Stop, and have to bargain with that driver for their lack of cash. He accepts a carabiner (which I find out is part of rock-climbing equipment. I would think that the show supplies that sort of thing when necessary ... why would they carry one of those? Unless they spend their time at the Pit Stops keeping their stuntmen skills sharp by scaling the overnight locations). They make it to the Mat before Kisha & Jen but are told by a very scowling Phil that they’ve really done it this time! and incurred TWO 2-hour penalties. "You broke a Race rule and used a personal possession to pay cab fare. Twice." Shame, shame!
I have to break in here though - I could swear that on other Races I’ve seen contestants offer shoes, jackets, and the like to get their cabbie paid off. I remember! It was our loveable nerds, Andrew & Dan, who kept running out of money and offering anything they could to their cabbie so they could go on their way. I guess the producers added the rule for this season (or they don’t like Mark & Michael, who are either being persecuted unfairly so they lose, or really need to sit down and read the rule book!)
As Mark & Michael sit and stew for their 4-hour penalty, Kisha & Jen show up and know they’re last to check in. Phil lets them know they managed fourth place, and they were so relieved they broke down in tears. Mark & Michael are allowed to crawl up to the Mat where Phil tells them it is a non-elimination leg, but in addition to the required Speed Bump on the next leg of the Race, the leftover 3-plus hours of their penalty will be added to their start time. Michael tried to explain everything by saying they used personal belongings rather than stiff their cabbie because "we are in the land of Buddha and didn’t want to create any bad karma." Phil showed no sympathy - in fact, I think that’s the grouchiest he ever looked! I’m wondering what Phil has against these little guys! His blog isn’t up yet, but I will be looking for it!
The order of finish:
1 - Margie & Luke
2 - Cara & Jamie
3 - Victor & Tammy
4 - Kisha & Jen
5 - Mark & Michael (non-eliminated with mucho penalties)
So are the "new" rules a surprise to you too? Are you feeling sorry for the little guys or figuring they deserve it? Can Margie & Luke actually win this thing, being nice while screwing other teams as much as possible? Stay tuned, folks!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
