Wow! The Redheads Cara & Jamie were thinking that they finally managed to come in first place, and Phil hands them a clue and says "keep racing!" Lucky for Keisha & Jen, who had a major meltdown at a task, meaning they won’t be eliminated this leg and have a chance to catch up.
Our teams are told to fly to Beijing, China and find a foot massage spa. Tammy & Victor were excited since they were just to Beijing for the Olympics and had a familiarity with the city. After the Mat argument last week, Luke is saying "It’s done with Keisha & Jen. We’re going to finish in the final three and kick their ass." Margie & Luke get to the airport first and as Keisha & Jen wait behind them to book tickets, they all find out that particular counter doesn’t accept foreign credit cards. Margie gets upset and mumbles that Keisha & Jen get to the other counter first rather than "go in the order that they were there in the first place." It doesn’t matter in the end, as they are all on the same flight. Tammy & Victor, using their language skills, ask the seating agent to give them seats as far up front as possible and put the other teams as far back as possible (leaving the Redheads in the last row). Tammy mentioned that "we will bring shame to our family" if they didn’t make it through this leg of the Race.
Once in Beijing, Luke and Keisha bumped into each other as they were running for taxis, but luckily nothing came out of that - I’m sure neither wanted to end up arrested in China for fighting at the airport. Keisha & Jen ended up with a slow cab driver and Cara & Jamie passed them up, even though they were the last off the plane after being stuck way in the back. Tammy remarked that she didn’t like feet, and was hoping that the task at the foot massage spa didn’t involve having to give foot rubs. Cara & Jamie make it to the spa first and find a Road Block. "One team member had to first drink a Chinese medicinal tea. Then, they would sit back and "enjoy" a foot massage, known for its therapeutic powers, which walked the fine line between pleasure and pain and lasted ten minutes. If the racer could endure the therapeutic massage for the entire ten minutes, they had to drink another cup of tea to receive their next clue. However, if the pain was too intense, the racer could say, "Uncle", to stop the massage, but if they did, they had to restart the massage from the beginning." Cara wasn’t thrilled with anyone touching her feet but I’m sure she would have welcomed a regular foot massage over what was to come. She was reduced to tears, squirming all over the chair as Jamie threatened her not to say "uncle." Keisha had to bite on her jacket to get through the "massage." As Tammy went in and saw the two of them, she asked "is it really that bad?" and Cara told her "having a baby has to be easier than this!" After a few minutes Tammy admitted that she’d much rather mess with someone else’s feet than endure the pain. Luke overruled Margie, who offered to do the task, and was sorry, signing "ow" over and over again. He and Tammy ended up holding hands for courage, and after Tammy left, he bit on his cap to get through the rest. (I don't even want to know what the "happy ending" at this spa was!!! Plus, the shots of the local spa ladies grinning creeped me out.)
The teams had trouble finding a taxi to take them to the Guangcai Natatorium which allowed Margie & Luke to catch up. Keisha & Jen were first to leave, and Cara & Jamie were going for the same cab as Tammy & Victor, who were telling the cab driver where they needed to go. Jamie bulldozed her way to the cab, telling Tammy "not this time, sister," and Tammy decided to let it go because "Jamie scares me." (All Tammy would have to do is scream in Chinese that Jamie had a gun or drugs and she’d be a bit delayed, I’d think! Of course, I can only imagine the penalty Phil would give her for that....)
At the Natatorium, Tammy & Victor get there first and get the clue, which is a Detour - Sync or Swim. "In Sync, teams would try to master the skill of synchronized diving by jumping off the three-meter springboard and hitting the water in perfect unison. When they performed a jump where they hit the water simultaneously, and received a passing score of five from the judges, they would receive their next clue. In Swim, teams had to change into the revolutionary Speedo laser suit, the same type of suit worn by Michael Phelps when he won 8 gold medals at the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games. Then, they had to swim eight lengths of the pool in a 400-meter relay with team members alternating every two lengths, and competing against Michael Phelps’ time of 04:03.84 in the individual medley. While teams did not have to beat Phelps’ time, each team member had to complete 200 meters of the relay to receive their next clue."
Tammy & Victor decide to try the diving after watching a diver bounce twice on the board and jump in feet first, thinking it would be easier than the swimming. Victor looked embarrassed walking out of the locker room with the bathing suit they gave him, a little Speedo, saying "this is skimpy." It was funny watching them try to "dive" in unison - they were getting scores of 1's and 2's - they couldn’t even jump off the boards at the same time! Keisha & Jen had gotten there by this time and decided to try the diving because Jen had a huge fear of water and figured this would be easier to take than swimming. Jen walked out to the edge of the board and said "I can’t do this" so they decided to switch tasks. As they changed into the laser swimsuits, Keisha mentioned that "I don’t think these are made for someone with these thighs," trying hard to squeeze into the suit. She jumped in first to swim the first leg, and while I thought she was taking so long and grabbing onto the lane markers on the way back, I realized she was doing that after about 10 meters (which isn’t like a skip in the park, but c’mon already!) I was a swimmer in high school, but we swam yards - when I got to college I visited the pool and jumped in to do a few laps, and realized it was a meter pool - and meters are much longer than I expected! Still, the teams were not expected to go fast or look pretty doing it, or not even stick to one stroke (they could dog paddle if they wanted). After her first lap, Jen convinced Keisha to go back to the diving board for another crack at that.
Cara & Jamie had decided to do the swim, and while they weren’t anywhere near graceful in the water, they kept at it and finished the 400 meters in 9:53. They got their clue and were told to head to the Pit Stop at Drum Tower. They were excited, thinking that this was finally the leg they could come in first, but knowing that they’ve been first to leave tasks before and something always managed to screw them up like bad drivers or directions kept them anxious.
In the meantime, Margie & Luke did the swim and while Margie complained that it was hard to breathe in the swimsuit, they finished the race with a time to beat of 8:05. Talking in the cab about the troubles Keisha & Jen were having, Margie said "Jen and Kisha, bye bye. They’re tough on land, but in the water, they’re nothing."
Tammy & Victor finally decide to stop attempting to dive after failing miserably on numerous tries and switch to swimming. After two dives, Jen started falling apart, crying that she didn’t want to do the task any more. Keisha tried her best to convince Jen to keep moving, saying "we want to go out strong," and pretty much resigning herself to the fact that it was the end of the line for them. After their swim was over with a time of 10:29 and Tammy & Victor found a cab, Victor started having horrible cramps in his legs and they had to take some time for the cramps to stop so Victor could bend his legs and sit in the cab. By this time Keisha had convinced Jen to go back for the swim, and they Keisha put on a flotation jacket to show solidarity with Jen, and they managed to get through the 200 meters each. (Okay, if one can’t swim this makes sense, and they had to know it would be available - I just can’t fathom someone being that petrified in a pool [as opposed to a lake or river] and wearing a life vest! A definite advantage over the other teams not using the life vests.)
With Victor having cramp trouble, I figured this gave the producers a chance to show a little mystery - maybe Keisha & Jen had time to catch up (their swimming time was 18:19). Would there be an actual race to the Mat for 3rd place?
Well, no. As Cara & Jamie proudly jump on the Mat in front of Phil, pretty sure they finally finished a leg in first, Phil pulls out a clue and tells them "this leg of the Race is not yet over. Keep racing!" I almost felt sorry for them - almost. Maybe if they’d been a bit nicer to people along the way.....
So we find out next week who our final three teams are! Got a favorite? Who do you want out next week? Let's talk!
Monday, April 27, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
No Melting Mat, But Plenty of Bickering While the Stunt Guys Go Home
Well, after the much-hyped "mat meltdown" previews, it didn’t live up to the billing for me, although what led up to the arguments at the Mat seemed pretty childish and really rough for the Race! Luke and Jen got pretty physical going after the clue boxes, and it ended up with really bad feelings for both teams. Will they manage to settle down and behave like competitive adults or keep up the schoolyard fighting? We’ll see ....
The teams begin from Bangkok, Thailand and are told to fly to Guilin, China and then taxi to Qing Xui Lu to a hair salon and look for the clue box. Margie & Luke, leaving the Pit Stop first, find a flight leaving at 11:20 a.m. and no other teams can catch that flight. Tammy & Victor were excited about going to China - Tammy can speak fluent Chinese and they’re finally going to be able to communicate. It seemed like an omen when Jen said "With only five teams left, it’s getting tight and if someone’s in front of me I’m gonna knock ‘em over."
Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie caught up to Margie & Luke at the Guangzhou airport for their connecting flight, which was delayed. Kisha & Jen were on another flight leaving at 9:10 and ended up being first out of that airport. They were a bit worried, though, saying "We haven’t seen another team all day, we don’t know what the hell is going on." While Tammy & Victor easily tell their driver where they want to go, Luke says he’d like to go to a country where everyone is deaf, so they could have the advantage.
Kisha & Jen ended up with a cabbie who couldn’t find the hair salon and let them off in the wrong spot, killing what lead they had. Tammy & Victor see them and hope to pass them up, but their cabbie can’t find the salon either. Tammy laughs that "Even if we can speak the language, it just means we can understand that he doesn’t know where he’s going." Cara & Jamie have a great driver and are first to clue box, which tells them to go to the #24 Bridge. Tammy & Victor find the salon right after and are hot on the trail of the Redheads. Kisha & Jen jumped in another cab and said" We don’t trust Margie & Luke, they gave us wrong directions before." Margie & Luke get to the salon just before Kisha & Jen, and together they roam around like blind rats, with neither team seeing the clue box (and Luke could have stepped on it, he was so close). As they meander around, they manage to spot it from a couple doors down at the same time and took off running - and here comes the schoolyard behavior. Luke got there a hair before Jen, who pushed him a little (I think from the momentum of running, it didn’t look purposeful at all). Luke tries to keep Jen from getting her clue and Luke brought up his elbow and got really close to biffing Jen in the head. (Like getting the clue an extra second or two before Jen would really give them an advantage!) Jen calls him a bitch (and while I like Margie & Luke, I’m blaming Luke for this one, he maybe wasn’t a bitch, but he was acting like a real butthead). After his Mom tells him that the girls called him a bitch, Luke said "calling the deaf guy a bitch is not nice." (You know, Luke, you can’t have it both ways. Either you’re just like everyone else except you can’t hear, or you deserve special treatment. If the deaf guy acts like a bitch, he can be called a bitch!) Each team is yapping up a storm in their cabs, blaming the other team. Yeah, whatever. Get over yourselves, play nice kids!
At the bridge, Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie get their clues and find a Roadblock.
"In it, one team member had to take a raft out to the middle of the Li River and, with the help of a local, train birds known as cormorants to retrieve fish. Once they got their cormorant to return with a fish ten times, they would receive their next clue." Tammy and Jamie elect to try the task and as they take a boat out to the rafts, round two begins for Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke, as they get to the clue box at the same time at the bridge. Jen is in front this time and Luke bumps into her at clue box and knocks her into it. (There. Now you’re even, each one of you got the clue first. Now settle down & race nice!) The complaining continues, as Kisha & Jen tell Victor as they pass his boat that "Luke pushed me into the clue box." (Wah, wah wah).
Mark & Michael left a good 4 hours behind all the other teams and are just getting to the salon, where they must perform the speed bump task. They have to wash and dry two little old ladies’ hair. Obviously they couldn’t go into the salon without being licensed in China, and the stunt guys get to perform their task out in front of the salon on the street. (Really, I think that was just the producer's way of giving back to the locals, by letting them laugh at the two little Americans "massaging the scalps" of two poor Chinese ladies). The ladies sit in chairs with a little towel on their shoulders and the guys just dump shampoo on their dry hair and start scrubbing. Mark said "It’s like I’m giving my Mom a shampoo," and if that’s how they do it at their house, it’s definitely wierd!
Back in the water, Tammy’s birds are not cooperating in finding fish. Victor tells her to stop speaking English and speak Chinese to the birds. Jamie is pretty grossed out with the fish but was surprised that "they could teach the birds to get them and not eat the fish. If somebody put filet mignon in my mouth, I’d eat it." (Hear, hear, sister!) Jamie’s birds were fighting over the fish. Luke doesn’t see his bird coming and puts his hand out holding a fish and the bird bites him on the hand. Luke says "dumb bird" (yes, that’s right Luke - the deaf guy isn’t dumb for holding out a fish that birds are trained to go after). Tammy’s birds don’t seem into their work and keep flying away. Jen gets done first with Jamie a close second.
The clue instructs the teams to go to the Ancient South Gate. Jen mentions on the way that "I really believe in karma" with Luke getting bit by the bird. Thanks to her birds, Tammy lost the lead and they finished last at the task, but since Margie & Luke had the slowest boat pusher (no engines, they used long poles to push off from the bottom of the river) they left the task in third place. As Victor jumps into his waiting cab, he tries to get an advantage and tells Margie & Luke’s cabbie in Chinese to "slow down - you’re driving too fast."
Mark & Michael get done with their Speed Bump and take off from the salon, hoping to catch another team at the #24 Bridge. No such luck, and here’s where we realize that unless something really drastic happens to another team (like Luke throwing Jen off a bridge) they’re pretty much toast. And after hearing Mark say "fowl is fish" (referring to the clue at the Roadblock saying "Who’s ready for some fowl play?") I’m figuring that gives us the clue as to why they kept getting themselves in trouble with the rules - a little ditzy, guys.
At the Ancient South Gate, the clue is a Detour: Choreography or Calligraphy. "In Choreography, teams had to make their way to the central island, and join a group of locals performing their morning dance routine, a popular form of exercise in Guilin. After learning the dance, the team had to perform it for a pair of judges who would hand them their next clue after they executed the steps correctly. In Calligraphy, teams had to make their way across the twin bridges and find the first of four calligraphy stations. Once there, they had to copy a series of Chinese characters that form the name of their next artist’s station. When they successfully reached the fourth and final station, the artist would hand them their next clue." Cara & Jamie race off to choreography, with Jamie saying "I have the most atrocious handwriting - in college I couldn’t even read my own notes."
As Cara & Jamie learned the dance, they joked that their teachers were "manhandling us" as the couple pushed them into position. Still thinking this would be a piece of cake, they stated "We’re cheerleaders. We pick up choreography at a quicker pace, this is our advantage." So much for an advantage, they were stepping on other dancers and crashing into couples as they did the routine. Their teachers were having a great time on the sidelines laughing at them. After two attempts they are told they still don’t have it right, and Jamie is getting frustrated with the judge, who doesn’t speak English (imagine!) and can’t tell her what they’re doing wrong. (I keep wondering how long it will take to sink in to Jamie’s head that other countries speak different languages and it is not unusual for them not to speak English!) They stomp off to switch tasks, but decide to give it another shot by dancing until the music stops, not when they’ve been through the routine once. This was what they were doing wrong and they finally get their clue.
At the calligraphy station, Tammy & Victor are chattering in Chinese as the teams try to copy what he is drawing. They get done and tell the calligrapher to stamp them first, which the calligrapher goes along with - after all, he can understand them! Tammy & Victor try to garner sympathy from the artist, telling him that "if we don’t win our parents will cry themselves to death." The drawing wasn’t really that difficult, but finding the next station was the problem, and since Tammy & Victor easily found out where to go, Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke stayed right on their tails and followed them through the challenge.
Mark is in the boat covered up with a blanket and looking quite comfortable while Michael throws fish to his bird. I know it’s fun watching the birds retrieve the fish, but Michael was tossing the fish really far from the boat and wasting a lot of precious time. Maybe he knew they were done for and figured he’d have fun while he could.
Tammy & Victor finish the calligraphy task first and get their clue to go to the Pit Stop on foot. Margie & Luke and Kisha & Jen are close behind. Phil sees them all running and mentions it to the Chinese couple eating noodles and sipping tea at a table next to Phil, and they are more impressed with their lunch than the fact that a bunch of crazy Americans are barreling toward them. Kisha & Jen make it to the Mat first (running is their specialty, after all), with Tammy & Victor second and Margie & Luke third.
Phil looks at the teams and mentions that "things are getting a little more tense now, as we get closer to the finish." Victor smiles and agrees, but says "it’s a good spirited competition." This whole time, Margie is signing to Luke not to say anything, and Luke arguing that "I’m angry," After Victor’s remark, though, Margie blurts out that Jen "bashed into Luke" shoving him from behind - twice! - and then called him a bitch. Kisha & Jen babbled back to Phil, giving their side of the story about what happened. (Victor and Tammy are beginning to look worried, standing between the two teams on the Mat. Victor is probably thinking that he should keep his thoughts to himself from now on!) Luke gets pissed and walks away but Phil calls him back to "get your side of the story." He signs that "it’s my turn to talk now" and Kisha gives what is described as a "nervous giggle." This sets Margie off again, and she yells "don’t laugh at my son when he signs." Kisha says no, she smiles during tense situations, but Margie gets more pissed. "He’s signing and they’re laughing at him." Phil tries to calm her down and says "I don’t think that’s what they meant" but Margie’s on a roll and starts lecturing. "He’s lived with this his whole life and he doesn’t need it from people like you. You should understand oppression because you’re black and you’ve lived with it." Nice comment, empathetic, but lost on the sisters. You can’t make good points while screaming at someone (should have learned that from Jamie through the whole Race!) Of course, all this while they’re showing replays of the clue box battles, slow motion and all. Every time I saw the clips it fortified my feeling that all that drama and yelling was just overblown and ridiculous.
Cara & Jamie finally get their clue after the dance and made it to the Mat in fourth place. Cara asked Phil "were there five on this leg?" and felt very relieved when Phil confirmed it. Mark & Michael are shown doing the dance and looking hilarious with the teachers giggling even more than when watching the Redheads. Of course, they couldn’t make up the penalty time and ended up eliminated. They were nice enough guys, but their dumb mistakes and lack of knowledge of the rules eventually killed their chances. (And I really don’t mind - Michael’s nipples were starting to bother me. They’re really pointy and it was just ... weird.)
It’s getting interesting and close to the finish. Who’s got the best shot? Will Cara & Jamie actually be able to make it through the next leg so they can race in their own country (but don’t send Jamie down south, she’ll probably yell at people’s accents down there too!) Can Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke play nice, or will they start a war in another country? Will Tammy & Victor keep up their good relationship and cruise in to win? The end is near!
1 - Kisha & Jen
2 - Tammy & Victor
3 - Margie & Luke
4 - Cara & Jaime
5 - Mark & Michael - Eliminated
The teams begin from Bangkok, Thailand and are told to fly to Guilin, China and then taxi to Qing Xui Lu to a hair salon and look for the clue box. Margie & Luke, leaving the Pit Stop first, find a flight leaving at 11:20 a.m. and no other teams can catch that flight. Tammy & Victor were excited about going to China - Tammy can speak fluent Chinese and they’re finally going to be able to communicate. It seemed like an omen when Jen said "With only five teams left, it’s getting tight and if someone’s in front of me I’m gonna knock ‘em over."
Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie caught up to Margie & Luke at the Guangzhou airport for their connecting flight, which was delayed. Kisha & Jen were on another flight leaving at 9:10 and ended up being first out of that airport. They were a bit worried, though, saying "We haven’t seen another team all day, we don’t know what the hell is going on." While Tammy & Victor easily tell their driver where they want to go, Luke says he’d like to go to a country where everyone is deaf, so they could have the advantage.
Kisha & Jen ended up with a cabbie who couldn’t find the hair salon and let them off in the wrong spot, killing what lead they had. Tammy & Victor see them and hope to pass them up, but their cabbie can’t find the salon either. Tammy laughs that "Even if we can speak the language, it just means we can understand that he doesn’t know where he’s going." Cara & Jamie have a great driver and are first to clue box, which tells them to go to the #24 Bridge. Tammy & Victor find the salon right after and are hot on the trail of the Redheads. Kisha & Jen jumped in another cab and said" We don’t trust Margie & Luke, they gave us wrong directions before." Margie & Luke get to the salon just before Kisha & Jen, and together they roam around like blind rats, with neither team seeing the clue box (and Luke could have stepped on it, he was so close). As they meander around, they manage to spot it from a couple doors down at the same time and took off running - and here comes the schoolyard behavior. Luke got there a hair before Jen, who pushed him a little (I think from the momentum of running, it didn’t look purposeful at all). Luke tries to keep Jen from getting her clue and Luke brought up his elbow and got really close to biffing Jen in the head. (Like getting the clue an extra second or two before Jen would really give them an advantage!) Jen calls him a bitch (and while I like Margie & Luke, I’m blaming Luke for this one, he maybe wasn’t a bitch, but he was acting like a real butthead). After his Mom tells him that the girls called him a bitch, Luke said "calling the deaf guy a bitch is not nice." (You know, Luke, you can’t have it both ways. Either you’re just like everyone else except you can’t hear, or you deserve special treatment. If the deaf guy acts like a bitch, he can be called a bitch!) Each team is yapping up a storm in their cabs, blaming the other team. Yeah, whatever. Get over yourselves, play nice kids!
At the bridge, Tammy & Victor and Cara & Jamie get their clues and find a Roadblock.
"In it, one team member had to take a raft out to the middle of the Li River and, with the help of a local, train birds known as cormorants to retrieve fish. Once they got their cormorant to return with a fish ten times, they would receive their next clue." Tammy and Jamie elect to try the task and as they take a boat out to the rafts, round two begins for Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke, as they get to the clue box at the same time at the bridge. Jen is in front this time and Luke bumps into her at clue box and knocks her into it. (There. Now you’re even, each one of you got the clue first. Now settle down & race nice!) The complaining continues, as Kisha & Jen tell Victor as they pass his boat that "Luke pushed me into the clue box." (Wah, wah wah).
Mark & Michael left a good 4 hours behind all the other teams and are just getting to the salon, where they must perform the speed bump task. They have to wash and dry two little old ladies’ hair. Obviously they couldn’t go into the salon without being licensed in China, and the stunt guys get to perform their task out in front of the salon on the street. (Really, I think that was just the producer's way of giving back to the locals, by letting them laugh at the two little Americans "massaging the scalps" of two poor Chinese ladies). The ladies sit in chairs with a little towel on their shoulders and the guys just dump shampoo on their dry hair and start scrubbing. Mark said "It’s like I’m giving my Mom a shampoo," and if that’s how they do it at their house, it’s definitely wierd!
Back in the water, Tammy’s birds are not cooperating in finding fish. Victor tells her to stop speaking English and speak Chinese to the birds. Jamie is pretty grossed out with the fish but was surprised that "they could teach the birds to get them and not eat the fish. If somebody put filet mignon in my mouth, I’d eat it." (Hear, hear, sister!) Jamie’s birds were fighting over the fish. Luke doesn’t see his bird coming and puts his hand out holding a fish and the bird bites him on the hand. Luke says "dumb bird" (yes, that’s right Luke - the deaf guy isn’t dumb for holding out a fish that birds are trained to go after). Tammy’s birds don’t seem into their work and keep flying away. Jen gets done first with Jamie a close second.
The clue instructs the teams to go to the Ancient South Gate. Jen mentions on the way that "I really believe in karma" with Luke getting bit by the bird. Thanks to her birds, Tammy lost the lead and they finished last at the task, but since Margie & Luke had the slowest boat pusher (no engines, they used long poles to push off from the bottom of the river) they left the task in third place. As Victor jumps into his waiting cab, he tries to get an advantage and tells Margie & Luke’s cabbie in Chinese to "slow down - you’re driving too fast."
Mark & Michael get done with their Speed Bump and take off from the salon, hoping to catch another team at the #24 Bridge. No such luck, and here’s where we realize that unless something really drastic happens to another team (like Luke throwing Jen off a bridge) they’re pretty much toast. And after hearing Mark say "fowl is fish" (referring to the clue at the Roadblock saying "Who’s ready for some fowl play?") I’m figuring that gives us the clue as to why they kept getting themselves in trouble with the rules - a little ditzy, guys.
At the Ancient South Gate, the clue is a Detour: Choreography or Calligraphy. "In Choreography, teams had to make their way to the central island, and join a group of locals performing their morning dance routine, a popular form of exercise in Guilin. After learning the dance, the team had to perform it for a pair of judges who would hand them their next clue after they executed the steps correctly. In Calligraphy, teams had to make their way across the twin bridges and find the first of four calligraphy stations. Once there, they had to copy a series of Chinese characters that form the name of their next artist’s station. When they successfully reached the fourth and final station, the artist would hand them their next clue." Cara & Jamie race off to choreography, with Jamie saying "I have the most atrocious handwriting - in college I couldn’t even read my own notes."
As Cara & Jamie learned the dance, they joked that their teachers were "manhandling us" as the couple pushed them into position. Still thinking this would be a piece of cake, they stated "We’re cheerleaders. We pick up choreography at a quicker pace, this is our advantage." So much for an advantage, they were stepping on other dancers and crashing into couples as they did the routine. Their teachers were having a great time on the sidelines laughing at them. After two attempts they are told they still don’t have it right, and Jamie is getting frustrated with the judge, who doesn’t speak English (imagine!) and can’t tell her what they’re doing wrong. (I keep wondering how long it will take to sink in to Jamie’s head that other countries speak different languages and it is not unusual for them not to speak English!) They stomp off to switch tasks, but decide to give it another shot by dancing until the music stops, not when they’ve been through the routine once. This was what they were doing wrong and they finally get their clue.
At the calligraphy station, Tammy & Victor are chattering in Chinese as the teams try to copy what he is drawing. They get done and tell the calligrapher to stamp them first, which the calligrapher goes along with - after all, he can understand them! Tammy & Victor try to garner sympathy from the artist, telling him that "if we don’t win our parents will cry themselves to death." The drawing wasn’t really that difficult, but finding the next station was the problem, and since Tammy & Victor easily found out where to go, Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke stayed right on their tails and followed them through the challenge.
Mark is in the boat covered up with a blanket and looking quite comfortable while Michael throws fish to his bird. I know it’s fun watching the birds retrieve the fish, but Michael was tossing the fish really far from the boat and wasting a lot of precious time. Maybe he knew they were done for and figured he’d have fun while he could.
Tammy & Victor finish the calligraphy task first and get their clue to go to the Pit Stop on foot. Margie & Luke and Kisha & Jen are close behind. Phil sees them all running and mentions it to the Chinese couple eating noodles and sipping tea at a table next to Phil, and they are more impressed with their lunch than the fact that a bunch of crazy Americans are barreling toward them. Kisha & Jen make it to the Mat first (running is their specialty, after all), with Tammy & Victor second and Margie & Luke third.
Phil looks at the teams and mentions that "things are getting a little more tense now, as we get closer to the finish." Victor smiles and agrees, but says "it’s a good spirited competition." This whole time, Margie is signing to Luke not to say anything, and Luke arguing that "I’m angry," After Victor’s remark, though, Margie blurts out that Jen "bashed into Luke" shoving him from behind - twice! - and then called him a bitch. Kisha & Jen babbled back to Phil, giving their side of the story about what happened. (Victor and Tammy are beginning to look worried, standing between the two teams on the Mat. Victor is probably thinking that he should keep his thoughts to himself from now on!) Luke gets pissed and walks away but Phil calls him back to "get your side of the story." He signs that "it’s my turn to talk now" and Kisha gives what is described as a "nervous giggle." This sets Margie off again, and she yells "don’t laugh at my son when he signs." Kisha says no, she smiles during tense situations, but Margie gets more pissed. "He’s signing and they’re laughing at him." Phil tries to calm her down and says "I don’t think that’s what they meant" but Margie’s on a roll and starts lecturing. "He’s lived with this his whole life and he doesn’t need it from people like you. You should understand oppression because you’re black and you’ve lived with it." Nice comment, empathetic, but lost on the sisters. You can’t make good points while screaming at someone (should have learned that from Jamie through the whole Race!) Of course, all this while they’re showing replays of the clue box battles, slow motion and all. Every time I saw the clips it fortified my feeling that all that drama and yelling was just overblown and ridiculous.
Cara & Jamie finally get their clue after the dance and made it to the Mat in fourth place. Cara asked Phil "were there five on this leg?" and felt very relieved when Phil confirmed it. Mark & Michael are shown doing the dance and looking hilarious with the teachers giggling even more than when watching the Redheads. Of course, they couldn’t make up the penalty time and ended up eliminated. They were nice enough guys, but their dumb mistakes and lack of knowledge of the rules eventually killed their chances. (And I really don’t mind - Michael’s nipples were starting to bother me. They’re really pointy and it was just ... weird.)
It’s getting interesting and close to the finish. Who’s got the best shot? Will Cara & Jamie actually be able to make it through the next leg so they can race in their own country (but don’t send Jamie down south, she’ll probably yell at people’s accents down there too!) Can Kisha & Jen and Margie & Luke play nice, or will they start a war in another country? Will Tammy & Victor keep up their good relationship and cruise in to win? The end is near!
1 - Kisha & Jen
2 - Tammy & Victor
3 - Margie & Luke
4 - Cara & Jaime
5 - Mark & Michael - Eliminated
Monday, April 13, 2009
You Need Your Passport. Really! And About Those Transvestites.....
After a week’s hiatus for the Country Music Awards, the Amazing Race continues! Our teams this week seemed to have lost it a bit - two teams leave their backpacks at a boatyard, Jamie is still being obnoxious to non-English speaking people, and we learn of a new rule that I swear was never a rule before. Let’s get going....
Tammy & Victor, leaving first, are instructed to fly to Bangkok, Thailand. Once there, they have to taxi to a boatyard to find their next clue. Cara & Jamie, leaving second, decide they want an "official" taxi and ask another gentleman on the street if it was "official." When the gentleman goes to ask someone else, Jamie screams "Listen! Don’t talk to him!" She explains it by saying "the language barrier frustrates me and I just can’t do anything about it." Huh? She has no self-control? Or is she just an innate bitch?
All the teams end up on the same flight to Bangkok. They tell their taxi drivers to "go fast" and urge them to pass the cab ahead of them, but none of the cabbies know where they’re going. Margie & Luke are following Kisha & Jen’s taxi and when the drivers stopped to get directions, Margie instructed her driver to tell Kisha & Jen’s driver the wrong directions. While not nasty, Margie & Luke are definitely playing to win this Race. And just to look at them, you wouldn’t have figured them to get this far - a deaf guy and his mommy?
At the boatyard, the clue was a Roadblock. One team member was to attach a propeller to a boat to get their next clue. Cara & Jamie had caught up to Margie & Luke but Margie made very short work of the propeller-building and was done first. The clue told them to navigate the canals with a map to find their next clue. Luke told Margie to get their bags before they took off from the dock. I didn’t think much of that (seemed like a no-brainer to me) until the other teams caught up, told their cabs to wait, and concentrated on the propeller. Cara & Jamie ran back to the cab to get their backpacks, trying not to let the other teams know what their clue was. Mark & Michael get done and take off, leaving their belongings with their waiting taxi. I’m beginning to see trouble looming! Mark & Michael wrongly assume they’ll be bringing the boat back to the dock (why they figured this, I don’t know. Really. How many times do they begin in one place and go back to that place? Really!) Kisha & Jen take off without their bags OR their fanny pack (with their money and passports in it) and leave Kisha’s shoes on the dock as well. Now backpacks, with clothing, etc. I can see one could live without if one had to. But to leave your money and passports out in a foreign country and "hope" it will still be there when you get back....just plain dumb. Victor proves to be a lousy mechanic as his propeller doesn’t work the first time and he has to try again. By this time the other teams have all gone - and Tammy & Victor wisely go get their bags before they take off in their boat. As they putter down the canal in their boat, Jen frets about their fanny pack with their passports, but Kisha tells her they’ll be coming back and not to worry about it. Jen mentions that she’s "listening to big sister" but finds out being older doesn’t necessarily make one smarter. There is some conversation about going back for the bags with Mark & Michael, but they press forward also.
The next clue is a Detour - Broken Teeth or Broken Record. The official website is not up yet for me to copy it formally, so you’ll be stuck with the "unofficial" version: In Broken Teeth, the teams had to go to a hallway called "the aisle of smiles" to find people waiting in front of bowls of water with assorted dentures. The teams had to pick through the dentures and match 5 people with their correct teeth. For Broken Record, the teams would find a karaoke cab and ride along for five miles, singing with a group of lovely (?) women (?). A couple of those women had extra appendages, I’d bet, if ya know what I mean! Margie & Luke are the only team to opt for the denture fitting - Margie says "I’m a bad singer, he’s a really bad singer, so we’re going to spare the people of Bangkok." At least they get gloves, masks and safety glasses to wear while helping the people with their teeth. It was pretty icky, but pretty funny, and Luke was pathetic at trying to fit the dentures - he was sticking lower dentures in people who needed uppers. Margie, saying it wasn’t difficult to get into people’s "personal space" because she was a nurse, fit all five people and off they went to the Pit Stop.
Jen is still fretting about her passport "sitting on a dock somewhere" but they jump in the karaoke cab and sing along, having a great time. Jen cracked me up, though, talking about their ride: ''My first question was, are those transvestites? My next question was, why do they wear so much makeup? Third question was, why are we in a party taxi with three transvestites?'' In the meantime, Tammy & Victor catch up and decide "we’re Chinese, we have to do karaoke." Mark & Michael, after much arguing and debate, decide to go back to their cab at the boatyard for their backpacks before they attempt the Detour. Mark is berating Michael for wanting to go back for his backpack, saying a million dollars was much more worth it, while Michael kept mentioning "irreplaceable stuff" he didn’t want to leave behind. My thought here is the cost of the cab, sitting there with the meter running....and running....and the fare getting higher.
Kisha & Jen get done with their ride and have to find a cab driver to take them to the Pit Stop - but they have no money, so they have to hope they can sucker a taxi into taking them for free. Cara & Jamie are running around yelling at cabbies to find one who knows where the Pit Stop is - a palace (which to me would be something a cabbie should know about, no?) Tammy & Victor mention that they’re happy to see Cara & Jamie, considering the redheads were out of the boatyard way ahead, but they’ve caught up. Mark & Michael get back to their original cab, pay the man and get their stuff, noticing that there was another cab waiting. Feeling a little better that at least one other team would have to go back, they took off for the Detour to attempt the karaoke.
Tammy & Victor’s cab has to stop for directions to the Pit Stop, and Cara & Jamie’s cabbie (who was following Tammy & Victor) has to ask as well. Jamie continued screeching at her cab driver, telling him not to tell Tammy & Victor’s driver the directions. As Mark & Michael get back to the Detour, they were $185 short (Thai money, don’t know what it’s called) and bartered a flashlight and compass to make up for it. They figured they’d also have to negotiate the cab fare to the Pit Stop. They jump in the karaoke cab with their transvestites, although it seemed that they didn’t know the girls weren’t girls, saying that "we’re part of the entertainment business, so we know how to show these girls a good time." Oh, yeah. They’d show you a thing or two, guys! And not a thing you’d want to see!!!
Margie & Luke have already checked in first to the Pit Stop. Cara & Jamie get there second, and Kisha & Jen outrun Tammy & Victor to get to the Mat third. However, Phil tells them they cannot check in without their travel documents, because without their passports, they couldn’t leave Thailand and they’d have to go back for their documents before they could be checked in. (It would be helpful for Kisha to have her shoes as well). That gave Tammy & Victor third place.
I remember Dallas & Toni, the mom & son from last season, checking in at the Mat without their passports (after their belongings drove off in a cab in Russia). Phil didn’t tell them they couldn’t check in, but then, after some research I found out they were last anyway and therefore eliminated.
Mark & Michael get finished singing and hop in a cab to the Pit Stop, and have to bargain with that driver for their lack of cash. He accepts a carabiner (which I find out is part of rock-climbing equipment. I would think that the show supplies that sort of thing when necessary ... why would they carry one of those? Unless they spend their time at the Pit Stops keeping their stuntmen skills sharp by scaling the overnight locations). They make it to the Mat before Kisha & Jen but are told by a very scowling Phil that they’ve really done it this time! and incurred TWO 2-hour penalties. "You broke a Race rule and used a personal possession to pay cab fare. Twice." Shame, shame!
I have to break in here though - I could swear that on other Races I’ve seen contestants offer shoes, jackets, and the like to get their cabbie paid off. I remember! It was our loveable nerds, Andrew & Dan, who kept running out of money and offering anything they could to their cabbie so they could go on their way. I guess the producers added the rule for this season (or they don’t like Mark & Michael, who are either being persecuted unfairly so they lose, or really need to sit down and read the rule book!)
As Mark & Michael sit and stew for their 4-hour penalty, Kisha & Jen show up and know they’re last to check in. Phil lets them know they managed fourth place, and they were so relieved they broke down in tears. Mark & Michael are allowed to crawl up to the Mat where Phil tells them it is a non-elimination leg, but in addition to the required Speed Bump on the next leg of the Race, the leftover 3-plus hours of their penalty will be added to their start time. Michael tried to explain everything by saying they used personal belongings rather than stiff their cabbie because "we are in the land of Buddha and didn’t want to create any bad karma." Phil showed no sympathy - in fact, I think that’s the grouchiest he ever looked! I’m wondering what Phil has against these little guys! His blog isn’t up yet, but I will be looking for it!
The order of finish:
1 - Margie & Luke
2 - Cara & Jamie
3 - Victor & Tammy
4 - Kisha & Jen
5 - Mark & Michael (non-eliminated with mucho penalties)
So are the "new" rules a surprise to you too? Are you feeling sorry for the little guys or figuring they deserve it? Can Margie & Luke actually win this thing, being nice while screwing other teams as much as possible? Stay tuned, folks!
Tammy & Victor, leaving first, are instructed to fly to Bangkok, Thailand. Once there, they have to taxi to a boatyard to find their next clue. Cara & Jamie, leaving second, decide they want an "official" taxi and ask another gentleman on the street if it was "official." When the gentleman goes to ask someone else, Jamie screams "Listen! Don’t talk to him!" She explains it by saying "the language barrier frustrates me and I just can’t do anything about it." Huh? She has no self-control? Or is she just an innate bitch?
All the teams end up on the same flight to Bangkok. They tell their taxi drivers to "go fast" and urge them to pass the cab ahead of them, but none of the cabbies know where they’re going. Margie & Luke are following Kisha & Jen’s taxi and when the drivers stopped to get directions, Margie instructed her driver to tell Kisha & Jen’s driver the wrong directions. While not nasty, Margie & Luke are definitely playing to win this Race. And just to look at them, you wouldn’t have figured them to get this far - a deaf guy and his mommy?
At the boatyard, the clue was a Roadblock. One team member was to attach a propeller to a boat to get their next clue. Cara & Jamie had caught up to Margie & Luke but Margie made very short work of the propeller-building and was done first. The clue told them to navigate the canals with a map to find their next clue. Luke told Margie to get their bags before they took off from the dock. I didn’t think much of that (seemed like a no-brainer to me) until the other teams caught up, told their cabs to wait, and concentrated on the propeller. Cara & Jamie ran back to the cab to get their backpacks, trying not to let the other teams know what their clue was. Mark & Michael get done and take off, leaving their belongings with their waiting taxi. I’m beginning to see trouble looming! Mark & Michael wrongly assume they’ll be bringing the boat back to the dock (why they figured this, I don’t know. Really. How many times do they begin in one place and go back to that place? Really!) Kisha & Jen take off without their bags OR their fanny pack (with their money and passports in it) and leave Kisha’s shoes on the dock as well. Now backpacks, with clothing, etc. I can see one could live without if one had to. But to leave your money and passports out in a foreign country and "hope" it will still be there when you get back....just plain dumb. Victor proves to be a lousy mechanic as his propeller doesn’t work the first time and he has to try again. By this time the other teams have all gone - and Tammy & Victor wisely go get their bags before they take off in their boat. As they putter down the canal in their boat, Jen frets about their fanny pack with their passports, but Kisha tells her they’ll be coming back and not to worry about it. Jen mentions that she’s "listening to big sister" but finds out being older doesn’t necessarily make one smarter. There is some conversation about going back for the bags with Mark & Michael, but they press forward also.
The next clue is a Detour - Broken Teeth or Broken Record. The official website is not up yet for me to copy it formally, so you’ll be stuck with the "unofficial" version: In Broken Teeth, the teams had to go to a hallway called "the aisle of smiles" to find people waiting in front of bowls of water with assorted dentures. The teams had to pick through the dentures and match 5 people with their correct teeth. For Broken Record, the teams would find a karaoke cab and ride along for five miles, singing with a group of lovely (?) women (?). A couple of those women had extra appendages, I’d bet, if ya know what I mean! Margie & Luke are the only team to opt for the denture fitting - Margie says "I’m a bad singer, he’s a really bad singer, so we’re going to spare the people of Bangkok." At least they get gloves, masks and safety glasses to wear while helping the people with their teeth. It was pretty icky, but pretty funny, and Luke was pathetic at trying to fit the dentures - he was sticking lower dentures in people who needed uppers. Margie, saying it wasn’t difficult to get into people’s "personal space" because she was a nurse, fit all five people and off they went to the Pit Stop.
Jen is still fretting about her passport "sitting on a dock somewhere" but they jump in the karaoke cab and sing along, having a great time. Jen cracked me up, though, talking about their ride: ''My first question was, are those transvestites? My next question was, why do they wear so much makeup? Third question was, why are we in a party taxi with three transvestites?'' In the meantime, Tammy & Victor catch up and decide "we’re Chinese, we have to do karaoke." Mark & Michael, after much arguing and debate, decide to go back to their cab at the boatyard for their backpacks before they attempt the Detour. Mark is berating Michael for wanting to go back for his backpack, saying a million dollars was much more worth it, while Michael kept mentioning "irreplaceable stuff" he didn’t want to leave behind. My thought here is the cost of the cab, sitting there with the meter running....and running....and the fare getting higher.
Kisha & Jen get done with their ride and have to find a cab driver to take them to the Pit Stop - but they have no money, so they have to hope they can sucker a taxi into taking them for free. Cara & Jamie are running around yelling at cabbies to find one who knows where the Pit Stop is - a palace (which to me would be something a cabbie should know about, no?) Tammy & Victor mention that they’re happy to see Cara & Jamie, considering the redheads were out of the boatyard way ahead, but they’ve caught up. Mark & Michael get back to their original cab, pay the man and get their stuff, noticing that there was another cab waiting. Feeling a little better that at least one other team would have to go back, they took off for the Detour to attempt the karaoke.
Tammy & Victor’s cab has to stop for directions to the Pit Stop, and Cara & Jamie’s cabbie (who was following Tammy & Victor) has to ask as well. Jamie continued screeching at her cab driver, telling him not to tell Tammy & Victor’s driver the directions. As Mark & Michael get back to the Detour, they were $185 short (Thai money, don’t know what it’s called) and bartered a flashlight and compass to make up for it. They figured they’d also have to negotiate the cab fare to the Pit Stop. They jump in the karaoke cab with their transvestites, although it seemed that they didn’t know the girls weren’t girls, saying that "we’re part of the entertainment business, so we know how to show these girls a good time." Oh, yeah. They’d show you a thing or two, guys! And not a thing you’d want to see!!!
Margie & Luke have already checked in first to the Pit Stop. Cara & Jamie get there second, and Kisha & Jen outrun Tammy & Victor to get to the Mat third. However, Phil tells them they cannot check in without their travel documents, because without their passports, they couldn’t leave Thailand and they’d have to go back for their documents before they could be checked in. (It would be helpful for Kisha to have her shoes as well). That gave Tammy & Victor third place.
I remember Dallas & Toni, the mom & son from last season, checking in at the Mat without their passports (after their belongings drove off in a cab in Russia). Phil didn’t tell them they couldn’t check in, but then, after some research I found out they were last anyway and therefore eliminated.
Mark & Michael get finished singing and hop in a cab to the Pit Stop, and have to bargain with that driver for their lack of cash. He accepts a carabiner (which I find out is part of rock-climbing equipment. I would think that the show supplies that sort of thing when necessary ... why would they carry one of those? Unless they spend their time at the Pit Stops keeping their stuntmen skills sharp by scaling the overnight locations). They make it to the Mat before Kisha & Jen but are told by a very scowling Phil that they’ve really done it this time! and incurred TWO 2-hour penalties. "You broke a Race rule and used a personal possession to pay cab fare. Twice." Shame, shame!
I have to break in here though - I could swear that on other Races I’ve seen contestants offer shoes, jackets, and the like to get their cabbie paid off. I remember! It was our loveable nerds, Andrew & Dan, who kept running out of money and offering anything they could to their cabbie so they could go on their way. I guess the producers added the rule for this season (or they don’t like Mark & Michael, who are either being persecuted unfairly so they lose, or really need to sit down and read the rule book!)
As Mark & Michael sit and stew for their 4-hour penalty, Kisha & Jen show up and know they’re last to check in. Phil lets them know they managed fourth place, and they were so relieved they broke down in tears. Mark & Michael are allowed to crawl up to the Mat where Phil tells them it is a non-elimination leg, but in addition to the required Speed Bump on the next leg of the Race, the leftover 3-plus hours of their penalty will be added to their start time. Michael tried to explain everything by saying they used personal belongings rather than stiff their cabbie because "we are in the land of Buddha and didn’t want to create any bad karma." Phil showed no sympathy - in fact, I think that’s the grouchiest he ever looked! I’m wondering what Phil has against these little guys! His blog isn’t up yet, but I will be looking for it!
The order of finish:
1 - Margie & Luke
2 - Cara & Jamie
3 - Victor & Tammy
4 - Kisha & Jen
5 - Mark & Michael (non-eliminated with mucho penalties)
So are the "new" rules a surprise to you too? Are you feeling sorry for the little guys or figuring they deserve it? Can Margie & Luke actually win this thing, being nice while screwing other teams as much as possible? Stay tuned, folks!
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