Directionally Challenged People Just Don't Do Well on The Amazing Race: Bye Bye Lance & Keri

Well, Lance & Keri (those of the major Boston accent - "nothing could tear us apaaaaaaat") are gone. Their lack of direction finally did them in.

Sorry this is late, but I watched the show in New York, there for my granddaughter's christening - didn't get home till Tuesday. Better late than never!

The teams are told to fly to the Persian Gulf and find the world's tallest building. They're not told where in the Persian Gulf, and they have to figure out that the building is "the Burj Dubai, a colossal structure still under construction that is nearly twice the height of the Empire State Building. They had to figure out they needed to fly to the city of Dubai. Sam & Dan give us a taste of Stupid Americans by asking the Cambodian cab driver where the Persian Gulf is. They're from Liberty, Missouri, which I guess doesn't have TV or newspapers - or Sam & Dan live under a rock. Brian & Ericka say that they're trying to be nice to the other teams because this Race is "all about Karma." (No, it's all about A MILLION DOLLARS!) I just really looked at Cheyne's hair, too, and it looks like he styles it in a wind tunnel! During Lance & Keri's interview Keri tells us that they have a strong bond - and then Lance, ever the romantic, says that "we have a lot of nonrefundable deposits on our wedding, I'm not gonna miss out on that." Mika & Canaan, our little Christian couple, show the first cracks in their sunny relationship...they see that they have to go to the world's tallest building, and Mika is petrified of heights. Canaan tells her that "you need to change that little tune" and she tells him "you need to quit telling me what to do." Love the look of "wha-a-a?" on his face!

We see Sam & Dan at a window asking for tickets to the Persian Gulf, and hear them say the first sensible thing - "The Persian Gulf isn't even a country." Brian tells them they need to go to Dubai, which bums me out, I would have liked to see how long it took them to figure it out. Brian tells everyone as they get to the airport where they need to go. Lance & Keri stop at an internet cafe and try to get tickets but the website is slow (although Lance decides that it's because all the tickets are being bought up). Lucky for them, they get to the airport in time and get on the same flight with all the other teams.

As they jump into cabs, the teams all remark on the heat (and we can see the cameras fogging up). They have to make their way to a fountain where they would sign up for one of two groups scheduled to ride the elevator to the 124th floor of the Burj Dubai the following morning. Maria & Tiffany get there first and sign up in the first group, followed by Brian & Ericka, Sam & Dan and Meghan & Cheyne.

Mika & Canaan get a cab driver that doesn't know where the fountain is, and we see Canaan throwing a hissy fit. They make it and get into the second group. As they waited for their turn, Mika stressed herself out even more worrying about having to jump off somewhere. To his credit, Canaan was a bit more supportive this time. It turned out to be anticlimactic, because once on the 124th floor, the clue simply told them to go back down and look for a parking structure, get in a marked car, and drive to the desert. There is also a Fast Forward (the only one of the Race). "In this Fast Forward, teams had to travel to the Dubai Autodrome, the only racetrack of its type in the Persian Gulf. Then, driving in an F3 open-wheel racecar and accelerating up to speeds of 100 mph, one team member must complete a lap in 45 seconds or less." Meghan & Cheyne decide to go for it, and the other teams didn't want to challenge them and possibly lose, losing precious time. The second group gets their clues and gets back down to ground level, and Mika is breathing probably the biggest sigh of relief she's ever done. Lance & Keri, our directionally challenged couple, take off in the other direction while looking for the parking garage (even though Keri tells him that everyone else was going the other way. And remember, according to Lance, Keri is the stupid one!)

Mika & Canaan don't follow the other teams to the desert and end up very behind everyone, except for Lance & Keri who continue to get themselves lost. Meghan & Cheyne, meanwhile, get to the Fast Forward and Cheyne is excited to find out he gets to drive a race car around a track, and if he finishes the lap in less than 45 seconds, they'll get their clue. Meghan is in tears watching him, being afraid for his safety. Cheyne decides "I'm the man!" and gets around the track in time on the first try. They're instructed to drive a Maserati to the Pit Stop, where they get to the Mat in first place.

The other teams made it to the desert and get to the clue box, which has a Roadblock. "In it, one team member had to choose a traditional bag and search the desert for water that was stored in urns buried in the sand. However, not all of the urns contained water. When they found enough water to fill their bag, they had to give it to a Bedouin and his thirsty camels in order to receive their next clue." Dan, Tiffany and Brian started off in the sand, and Tiffany was the first to find an urn - but no water. Brian found an urn with water and secretly filled his bag, then told Dan and Tiffany where to find it. "If you help people now, they're gonna help you down the road." (Not necessarily, Brian - not if helping you hurts their chance at a million bucks!) Dan's ladle broke as he was getting the water, but Tiffany let him use hers and waited for him as he filled his bag. Mika & Canaan managed to beat Lance & Keri to the task, but both of them wandered in the sand looking for water - Lance showing his wonderful attitude once again when he found an empty urn and chucked it into the sand, breaking it. Canaan found water and got done ahead of Lance.

The clue told the teams to "drive back into the city and find Ski Dubai, an indoor ski resort with more than 22,000 square meters of snow." As Maria drove off in their car, she ran over a spike and punctured a hole in the radiator. She commented that "I have an excuse because I'm an Asian female driver." Sam & Dan hung around with them until they got a new car, which can either be seen as stupid or chivalrous depending on your point of view.

Once to the "ski" resort, the clue was a Detour "with the choice of Build a Snowman or Find a Snowman. In Build a Snowman, teams had to carry snow from the frigid winter conditions inside, to the blistering heat outdoors. Once there, they had to build a traditional snowman complete with two coal eyes, a carrot nose, and top hat. In Find a Snowman, teams had to take a chairlift up the mountain and then sled down to a mound of snow. Once there, they had to search through the massive pile of snow for a tiny snowman buried within it." They had to take their snowman to a polar bear and they would get their next clue. (That polar bear was a little creepy too). Matt & Gary get there first and decide to Find a Snowman. Shortly Maria & Tiffany, Brian & Ericka, Sam & Dan, and Flight Time & Big Easy join them and Ericka manages to find the snowman in the snow first. They take off for the Pit Stop and arrive in second place. Maria & Tiffany and Sam & Dan take off with Matt & Gary to switch tasks and build a snowman, but the Globetrotters stick with the snow pile and manage to find a snowman. As they rush off to the Pit Stop, they run into Mika & Canaan on their way in and told them to grab their coats, which Mika & Canaan appreciated, saying "The Globetrotters really helped us out."

The other teams manage to get their snowmen built, and they didn't melt as fast as one would have expected - although the snowmen weren't actually works of art either. They got the required parts together, though, and all got their clues.

Lance & Keri went right to making a snowman, and when they finished Lance confused the clue-giver by asking if he could kick the snowman apart before he got his clue. This guy is something! All their bad choices piled up on them, though, and they were eliminated.

So here's the order the teams finished:

1 - Meghan & Cheyne
2 - Brian & Ericka
3 - Big Easy & Flight Time
4 - Sam & Dan
5 - Maria & Tiffany
6 - Mika & Canaan
7 - Lance & Keri - Eliminated

So, sorry that the bickering Bostonians are gone? They did add a little spice to what seems to be a bunch of teams that like each other. See any good fights coming or are we destined for a bunch of good-Karma-seeking, helpful teams? Stay tuned!